What does it really mean to live a human life?

I feel whatever I have done so far was definitely living the human life.

The ups and the downs,

the mistakes,

the disappointments,

the love, the hate, and everything in between,

the seeking and the disappointment of not finding what I am seeking,

awareness

and lack of it too is the human life

the ignorance, 

stupidity which we all hate,

the wisdom which is so rare,

and good sense!

The human life has so many things in it

It is so hard to choose what yours is going to be

u dont want your parents life

u dont want ur friends life,

u want to make it ur own.

So,

who am I?

That will put everything in perspective.

But it's so difficult to answer this question.

Why is it so difficult?

How can something so simple be so difficult?

Who are you?

Am I a woman? An Indian? A hindu? A Goan? A shinkre? A Mulay? A vegetarian? An environmentalist? A lawyer? A writer? 

No.

Just keep it simple.

Why can't you keep it simple?

Why are you using so many terms to describe an individual? In-divisible?

I am all of it and yet some more.

So define it for now.

Who am I?

I am a human being.

Human beings are not eternal. They are born and they die.

That sounds fine. 

I am a human being.

Is that all?

But you read that there is something that is beyond just your body, something that is eternal, what about that?

So okay, I am in a human body.

What is that I? which is in a human body right now?

Consciousness.

Awareness.

They also call it the spirit, god particle. 

I am the universal consciousness.

What does that mean?

It means I am everything,

I am everywhere.

I am in this body also.

And outside of this body also.

How do you know you are outside this body?

How do I know I am inside this body? 

Because I can control my movement,

i can not control anything outside of me.

You can.

You can move the furniture around your house and you can tell your dog to sit where you want it to sit.

Right now it's working on proximity.

Whatever is closer to you , has some.of your control.

Far away things dont have much control right now because you are limited by a belief that you can not make Ruben call you. 

Let's try right now,

let's make Ruben call Janaki's number.

He rarely calls at this time.

I don't know the process. But I will use my thoughts to reach him and make him pick up his phone and call me.

I tried for 4 to 5 mins and he did not call.

Maybe I need to use it for a longer time.

In the past I have made things happen, things have worked my way.

Such as what?

The Rivona land case, This apartment negotiation, I have been able to put my influence.

I also wanted to have a lot of rescued animals and I have them now.

So,

what else do I want to make it happen?

I want to work with Adv.Amey Prabhudessai.

I want to work as a lawyer for the rest of my life and find the meaning, peace and balance and everything that one finds in meditation through law and legal practice. 

I want to do all of my chores by myself.

I want to live a quiet, undramatic life.

I want to practice silence and talk only when necessary.

I want to have lazer sharp focus and master distraction free lifestyle.

I want to be simple, financially and mentally independent from my family and culture and practice a truly global presence.

Oh yes,

I want to be a presence.

Not a personality.

Just a presence. 

That's who I want to be.