Meeting the Real Howard Roark! ( Reading the Fountainhead Part 2)

He is slender, not too tall, straight jet black hair, sharp eyes and a mocking , smirk-like smile adorns his child like face! This isn't the first time I am seeing him, he is the son of a family friend, but we've hardly ever spoken. I only heard stories of him, stories of his rebellious nature, stories of his experiments with life...................but there wasn't a word I heard from him...he was quiet, always , as if someone had punished him and he wasn't to speak until permitted!

Something about his face was highly attractive, those deep black steady eyes showed self assurance and confidence....he walked straight, easily, and at his own pace, never too fast, never too slow.

Once, I tried to strike some conversation, he looked disinterested, I did not feel offended ( surprisingly! Because if any other guy had done that, I would never turn back and look at him a 2nd time......but this guy was different. Something told me it wasn't about ego or intention.....there was more and I had to know him )and decided I rather observe this guy and study him before talking to him again.

This man is not the conventional guy you meet everyday....for matters of privacy I cannot disclose his name. people laugh at him, because he doesn't do what they expect him to do.....he's his own boss. Everybody advices him about what to do in life, I doubt he's ever asked anyone for their opinions so he never insults them but he never abides them too and then people feel insulted ! That's why he is almost in everybody's bad books!

For a while I thought, which girl would ever be interested in a guy like this?? But upon having observed him for a few days and on a few occasions, i wondered, which woman wouldn't fall for him??

When he does decide to speak, all you can ever do is shut up and listen because his stories are like none other, his experiences of life - like something you've never imagined, never heard....and it's the stuff he's done, not some cooked up stories like you hear from most other guys.......
He quickly makes friends with guys,
and the villagers and yes children too,
For some reason, he always chooses which girls he will talk to, and once he does choose, he'll take her on a ride of a lifetime....

I admire men like these in whose company i feel different, whose auras give me a sense of the possibilities of human life and strength......he might be a no one to the world today.....but he's definitely someone amusing for me! He's not someone you meet and forget, but someone you remember for a lifetime........Whenever I sit down to write of a central, male character, its his face I see!

When I first decided to start blogging, my first blog was based on him. But I never could complete it, because I could never understand him fully. When I read The Fountainhead, just a few paragraphs about Howard Roark and the puzzle pieces fell into its place, it was alomost like finding the key to knowing this guy ...

Reading the fountainhead from that point onwards became much more interesting, because I could relate to it. I have met the "Peter Keating" types too, not one, but several of them.....they never make you feel good! Even if you are happy with them at a particular point, you can never trust them, because they are so scared of something.......they are always over burdened with finding responsibility and stability in life! I always look down upon these 2 things- Responsibility and Stability...because they spoil the essence of life, they kill the adventure in a man and make him nothing but a robot!

Fountainhead hasn't been an eye opener, in fact it is more like coming face to face with many emotions within me, which I always tried to hide, which I thought were bad...............Fountainhead only made me more comfortable with myself and my ideas!

Reading "The Fountainhead!" ( Part 1)

I have been thinking of writing a post about something all these days but I haven't been able to concentrate on anything because I am reading "The Fountainhead!"

It's a big book and I've just started, but every page, every dialogue brings a storm in my thinking head!

After reading the first 100 pages I was simply awed, and asked myself, Why didn't I read this book all these years?  It looks like "The Book" I had been searching for, waiting for! 

I am still just reading it, so it will be better to say anything about it only when I finish!

But I couldn't keep away from blogging, Gosh I've missed this space and I don't like the heading " Why I killed Gandhi" all over my blog for such a long time.....it's time to move on to the next topic.....Gandhi is dead and so is Nathuram....so let's talk about happier times...or anything else...

Before I sign off, the dialogues that touched my soul:

"Don't you know that most people take most things because that's what's given to them, and they have no opinion whatever? Do you wish to be guided by what they expect you to think they think ,or by your own judgment?"



" What do you want? Perfection?"
" - or nothing. So , you see, I take the nothing!"
" That doesn't make sense."
"I take the only desire one can really permit oneself. Freedom, Alvah freedom!"
" You call that Freedom?"
" To ask nothing. To expect nothing. To depend on nothing!"


Awesome!
Hats off to Ayn Rand!

2 states- The story of my marriage By Chetan Bhagat

I'll try as much as possible not to make this one into a book review!

I bought this book because:

1: It's cheap! priced at just Rs. 95/- ( Mr. Bhagat- A IIMA student definately knows what sells at what price in India! Indians love all those things that are priced under Rs. 100/-. No wonder he's the best selling author in India!)

2: I've a Reader's Block these days. I dont know if any such thing exists, but I think its almost been 4 months since I read anything useful! Partly cause my life is too exciting at the moment- that I find any book or any film boring in comparison! yes! I havent watched a single movie for the past couple of months too!

So, in order to beat out of this block, something light and funny was needed- so started on this book!

3: I am a big fan of his 1st book " 5 point someone" . I like his funny style and use of language, it runs a smile through my face and I love smiling!

4: He says it's a story of his marriage- I wanted to know if everybody suffers in marriage, or is it just me?

While reading the book:

1: It's funny: Mr. Bhagat has kept up his funny style and similies! I especially love all those times he makes comments and describes his in laws, like this one " Ananya's mother looked as if she had fallen into a drum of golden paint" - she wore a Kanjeevaram sari!

2: It brought me out of the block, now I can start reading the more serious books!

After Reading:

1. Not a great book- nothing compared to 5 point someone!

2. Mr. Bhagat , enough of IIT- IIM......! No more please! It started getting on my nerves, I dont think the smartest brains make it into IIT-IIM! I think the most boring and geeky get into those institutes! Ok, let me not generalise, I know you need to work damn hard to get through, but I am of the opinion that you cant judge a person's intelligence merely with the kind of paychecks they get!Mr. Bhagat is right though, in describing his citi bank job as one of the most boring!

3. This story is about his journey till his marriage! Which is usually fun! :) So, it did not clear my doubts fully!


4. Will I buy his next book?

Yes! Yes! Yes!
A. Because I've bought and read all of them so far!
B. The 2nd was bad, 3rd was ok, the latest being better than the 4th.......but I'll always keep loving his style and
C. I am his sincere fan!

So, if you need a good laugh, or just a casual read, please go and buy this book! It's worth the price!

The Book That Made Me

I was never fond of reading as a child. My mother bought loads of books- with illustrations, without illustrations, cartoon series- but to no avail. My sister finally handed me a Noddy when I was in 7th std, she said it was high time I start reading something. Noddy is made for KG students requirements. It has around 20 pages, half a page is full of pictures. I came from a Marathi medium school, so I could be excused for reading this book- my sis re assured me. I wasn’t enjoying reading this book- but at least I was reading all the pages and finishing the book.

In the holiday’s of 7th std, I saw a fat book on my father’s table- Sidney Sheldon “Tell Me Your Dreams” . I’ve been very fascinated with dreams, and I thought this might be something dealing with that. So I picked it up. My sis came around, she giggled, “see the size 1st. see the size!” I banged the book on the table and went out to play.



That night, I secretly got that book and opened to read the 1st page. In comparison to Noddy, the font was extremely small, and since I was hiding and reading it- it made things even more difficult for me. But the 1st page itself was so interesting, I read on.

Pages turned into chapters and minutes turned into hours- the plot moved damn fast and it wasn’t like I was reading a book, it was as if I was watching a film. My mom and sis did tell me books are more interesting than films but I never paid attention to them. My imagination, coupled with the words of the author was better than any film I had watched!

It was late, somewhere around 3 am, I could hardly sleep, and I was already through half the book.

Next morning, my sister was surprised to see me sleeping with a book in my hands. When she woke me up, I hurriedly brushed and got back to reading. Within a few hours I had read that fat book- and was left completely awestruck!

That year, I read all his books.


Sidney Sheldon has had such an impact on me- I always thought I loved his books, until recently when I realize a lot of my thought process is a result of his books and plots. His protagonist always is a woman, and a woman who is hurt by someone- and she hits back with vengeance!

Today, when I am hurt- the 1st reaction is to take revenge! Tit for tat! An eye for an eye!

My values have been always to learn to forget and to forgive- but I find myself in a confusing state of mind. Life really works the way Sidney says in his books. There have been incidences when I was back stabbed by my closest pals, people I trusted so much! Nobody talks about it- but Revenge- everyone takes! It simply feels good!

But now I want to rise higher, get out of this Sidney effect and learn to live life in a peaceful manner- I am sure it has to be a book again which will teach me a new way of life. And I am in search of it!