What to do when I start spiraling down?

There are a few people whose energy always pulls me down! 

I have tried keeping distance, not talking to them, 

yet,

they try every little way to be in my life,

and every time they do that, my energy shifts to lower levels.

I don't remember the last time I felt happy in their company.

Happiness is short lived, happy moments are very few and they are mostly instantly taken over by negative thoughts and memories. 

Then I tell myself, you can't possibly expect to be happy in the company of those who bully you, who constantly comment and manipulate you. Come on! Stop expecting these kinds of people to make you anything but happy. Whether it's the oil in my hair or the length of my hair- they seem to be having a problem! From the size of my breasts, to the color of my dress, to my diet choices!

According to them - everything I do is inferior, bad in taste, wrong in some way, should be stopped, should not be continued- and this I am told in not so subtle ways every time I meet them.

But if I as much as even give a slight suggestion (for their own good health- example- 'maybe you should avoid eating out so much since you are taking this strong medicines'. Or 'maybe you should wear organic cotton so that your skin can breathe'), if I as much as slightly suggest these 'changes' , they hound on me like I am the worst person on this planet! 

So,

how to deal with such relationships?

That's the question I am going to deal with today.

I have been tracking my moods,
my mood and energy is absolutely down today!

And I have been wondering what's wrong.

Had an argument with Amol for no good reason.

When I backtrack, I find only one reason- One of them messaged me on sunday for a meeting- I declined the invitation, 

then another one of them emailed me on monday- telling me how I was wrong.

 After much thought, I replied to the email on wednesday, keeping it short, not going into any justifications on my part but also not encouraging any further emails from them.

Thursday, friday and now saturday, my reaction to their words has snowballed into deep resentment towards all of them.

The problem with this is - if I stop interacting with them, the problem still continues.
It isnt as simple as a breakup, where once u breakup that person is out of ur life, initially u cry, u get angry but the healing process continues and after a few days or atleast a few months, u start regaining ur ground.

Here , there is no space for healing.
They keep doing what they do.
I keep getting hurt one way or the other.

The wound becomes deeper, the pain steeper. It becomes harder to climb out of it.
I dont have energy to spare on them and yet here I am , going into minus states!

This isn't just about a single incident—it’s an ongoing cycle that keeps pulling me back in, draining my energy. Unlike a clean break, where healing has space to happen, this situation keeps reopening the same wounds. And that’s exhausting.

My awareness of how this is affecting me is important. The resentment, the exhaustion, the energy drain—it’s all real. I know that cutting them off externally doesn’t fully solve the internal impact. So the question becomes: how do I break their power over my inner world?

What do I need right now? Not in the long run, not a solution for them, but for me—in this moment. Is it distance, silence, processing your feelings, or just dropping it all for now and shifting my focus? Because right now, my energy is precious, and I don’t have to let them take more of it.

First I need awareness that this is happening and then I need a sure shot solution which will work.

What is that one thing which will work for me in this situation? Which will help me stop reacting and spiraling down and thinking about them?

Reading a good book? Journaling? A good warm bath? Cleaning the house?

I need something that interrupts the spiral effectively—something that instantly shifts my mind and energy away from them and back to me.

From what I know about myself, two things seem to work best: writing (externalizing the thoughts) and physical action (breaking the state).

A Sure-Shot Solution:

1. A Mental Dump (Journaling or Speaking to Yourself)
Write down or voice-record everything unfiltered—exactly what’s bothering, without overanalyzing. This helps move the energy out of your mind and onto paper/audio.

2. A Physical Reset (Cleaning or a Warm Bath)
Right after journaling, do something physically engaging. Cleaning is great because it channels frustration into movement, while a warm bath shifts your nervous system into relaxation mode.

Bonus: If the spiral still lingers, read something deeply engaging (fiction, preferably) to fully occupy your mind.

The key is to not stay stuck in your head—first release, then redirect. If you do this consistently, you’ll break the pattern over time.