Wednesday, November 23, 2011

KISS Campaign!

Law College, Goa.
Year 2003
1st year

6 months into college, and my classmates were speaking this strange legal language. Worst, they seemed comfortable speaking that language.

Any intellectually stimulating conversations were to be made by throwing in these complex heavy legal words.

I know am not a genius, what I also know is that I was never born dumb!

These people, who chose to make normal conversations in legal language appeared to be smarter, wittier and above all more intelligent. What I could never understand was , why do you need to show off something you know you already have? If you are intelligent, you are intelligent, you don't have to throw your weight around everyone near you. In fact, the genius lies in making complex things simpler, not the other way round.


Unfortunately, The story of making things complex by using complex words when you can use simpler language doesn't stop at Law college or the legal system.

B'lore 
2009

when I stepped into the engineering community, I heard some of them talk the technical language in day to day conversations. I was lost again.

But the difference is, law is meant to be for the society, to help the society, to uplift it, to protect it. Engineers can afford to use technical language because they mainly deal with their kind of people, but laws are meant for everyone, so it better be simple enough for everyone to understand.


B'lore
2010

I stepped into the financial community, the same problem followed me here!

At a closer look I understand that the whole complex language use starts with mainly,the laws. In law college of course it were the legal documents , in finance too, it's the law which screws your understanding. The language of the tax laws, SEBI, FEMA, not only require the knowledge of legal language and its interpretation but also a very sound financial knowledge. I wonder, does everyone using these laws, which includes the common man, have the level of legal and financial knowledge required to understand these laws which are primarily made for them? 

Take the example of the tax laws, all of us pay taxes, how many of us understand the language in which the laws are written? It's complex and not understandable. In the process of being precise ,articulate and clear, we are highly compromising on simplicity which completes the cycle of understanding.


Take the example of most public documents, your day to day rental agreements, contracts, sale deeds, all these documents use such complex language, that by the time you are done reading the whole document, you are :
A. Exhausted.
B. Not understood anything.
C. Confused!!

After having learnt the law for 5 years, I still don't understand clearly what a document is trying to say. You don't believe me, take a look at these statements:



ARBITRATION CLAUSE IN BUILDING AGREEMENT



“In case any dispute should arise between the owner and the contractor, whether in respect of daily in supply of materials by the owner or delay in execution of work by the contractor, or the quality of the materials so supplied or the quality of the work done or in respect of decorations or alterations suggested or made or extra work required to be done and so executed or not, or in respect or measurements or work done or required to be done, or demand and payment for part or whole of the work done or not done or dealy or refusal in grant of architect’s certificate by the Engineer or its correctness or touching the interpretation, fulfilment or breach of any of the terms of these presents or in respect of deductions to be made or extra payments to be recovered for work improperly done or not executed or in respect of work got done through another contractor for default or breach or non-completion of work agreed to be done under the particulars and for assessment of the value thereof and fixation of liability for the same between the parties hereof or in respect of any act or omission arising out of the performance of non-performance or the obligations or duties pursuant to these presents, the said dispute or disputes shall be referred to the arbitration and final award of a single arbitrator if the parties agree thereto in writing (failing which to the arbitration of an arbitrator to be appointed by the President of the Institute of Engineers ) (or failing which to the arbitration of the municipal or corporation engineer or any competent engineer or architect nominated by him in writing ) on a reference made to him by any of the parties by notice in writing , a copy whereof will be served on the other party at the address mentioned above or such other address as may be notified by that other party sent by registered post. The arbitrator shall be entitles to proceed ex parte after notifying the parties by a reasonable notice as to the time and place therefor. The arbitrator shall also be entitled to associate with himself a surveyor, if necessary at his discretion. The arbitrator shall have power to reopen and revise any certificate granted by the architect engineer under these present.” 



This and other documents like these are supposed to be creating rights, duties, and responsibilities! No wonder we have so much litigation pending in our courts. 

When we understand these complex documents then  we proceed to  act accordingly. I bet not more than 5% of the population of India understands this language and this format of a public document! If 95% of us are struggling to understand the public documents, then I want to know for whom they are made??



I think it's time we follow the KISS campaign. "KEEP IT SHORT & SIMPLE!" It's time we don't get bullied by these user's of such complex language and ask them to simplify it and make us understand what they mean. And ask as many questions till you get the whole meaning and nothing less. If each one of us follows this rule, I bet more than half the users of this language won't be able to simplify it for us. Why? Because they haven't understood it themselves! Most of them memorise the format, because there really isn't any other way of doing it. 


Okay I understand we got our legal system from the Britishers, and we have tried to work our lives according to their language till now. But isn't it time we take some effort to simplify the language so that our people understand it? 
Isn't it the right of every citizen of this country to understand the law of the land? 
Do you know there is a presumption of knowledge of the law of the land, and you cannot plead innocent for not knowing the law? In other words, "ignorance of law is not an excuse before a court of law." Which means 95% of us who find it difficult to understand the legal language have got screwed, are being screwed or will get screwed sooner or later!


What the government or the judiciary should do , is take up a campaign to simplify all laws.
  • print and distribute them at a very low cost , 
  • published in all regional languages. 
Free legal aid is given by courts and some law colleges, but having been a part of such a legal aid society for 5 years, I don't trust the quality of service provided at such places.So quality could be improved.

What all of us can do?
  • If we are making a legal document or any public document: If it's long, summarise it in point format 1st, covering all the important aspects.
  • Use short sentences, simple words.
  • Read and write to be understood.

Any other suggestions, comments, viewpoints are welcome.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

An Early Morning Post

I have never written a blog post so early in the morning! It's 6 am as I write it!
The only time I remember waking up early, ( Early to me is 7am! Anything before that is "almost night"), is when I was in school, when I woke up by around 7.15 and hurried up and got ready for school by 8am. I remember my childhood when I look at Aadu and Molly now a days!

I remember, 'Bhai' or mamma,('Bhai' is what I call my father), used to come to our room and declare the time, which used to be 7am. Me and my sister always heard it, but never woke up at that time. Then at around 7.10, the fan would be turned off! And turning off the fan is a BIG No-No in Goa, since it is so hot! Still we adamantly continued sleeping! At about 7.15, mamma would barge into the room shouting at us,pulling our blankets, or dragging us out of the bed. I do not remember much whether I ever finished my breakfast or not, or whether I was quick to brush or did I just lull around till I made it to school. ..Oh yes, I do remember that me and my sister sometimes finished our breakfast sitting in the car, while my father drove us to school. Shoes almost every day would be worn in the car!

I was amongst the late comers at least twice a month. In fact we had our own gang of late comers, people who would always turn up late. We were the relaxed , laid back types. Taking a few shoutings and punishments from Lotlikar teacher or Mense sir did not stir us, whereas the 'first time' late comers or 'rarely-late' comers would shiver , some of them would even cry! I could never understand the commotion some kids threw at such minor happenings in life. I could also never understand why the 1st ranker of the class needed to cry after she( only she's can cry for getting less marks! I have never come across a 'he' who has cried for scoring less!), scored a few marks less than the highest marks in Maths or science!

But crying in school is something I have done.Why school? I have also cried in Law college, why college? I also ended up in tears once when my boss shouted at me while I was doing my internship in Mumbai!

In fact crying is an emotion that touched me very late in life. Somewhere by the end of school life. And it became an emotion I could not control for many years. There was no saying, when , where and how I will cry. I just had to let go of all the frustration that would built up in me. And this has led to a series of embarrassing incidents, for me and also the immediate person responsible for all my tears! But still, throughout my school and college life I never cried for marks, ( I had other criteria that made me cry.)I only cried last year when I did not pass my exam at the 1st attempt! That too an attempt I had given half hearted without any preparation.

Failing an exam was an experience I only had last year. And it sucks!! I know of too many people who comment, laugh and pass judgements on people who have failed a couple of times in their exams, especially some important and tough exams! These are typically those people who themselves have never given a competitive exam and have no guts to even think of attempting one! Thankfully I had no one but myself who criticised me for not studying a "Lil harder", as I had not made the cut by a few marks ( It's always like that, isn't it?)
After giving the 1st paper, I felt so terrible about myself. I had never sat through an exam looking at people's faces. An examination hall is the last place I want to check people out. I better have stuff to write down on those sheets, and so I studied damn hard for the next attempt, and thank god! I passed!



It's amazing how my mind starts shooting memories and thoughts and information from the 1st moment I wake up! I know the mind is working throughout the night as well, but early morning thoughts are fresh! They give a new dimension to life, based on what has been learnt so far.

As for me, till yesterday I struggled hard to deal with a lot of emotional backlog, and a lot of study backlog as well. It's always this way, that when you have an important exam facing you in your face( say professionally), there's also an emotional exam tugging at your back! And you are stuck.....it takes so much courage and patience to decide to move your butt some way and kick off both the exams so hard in their face that you make your way clear!

It's the start of a new month today!
Also the start of a new study schedule...it's my final lap for this exam!
Also the Birthday of one of my favourite person! ( And no....I'm not talking about Aishwarya Rai!)
And also the Karnataka Rajyotsava Day!
It's more than 1 reason to be happy, to start up early, to smile and to be at my best!!

Wishing you all A very Good Morning!

Love,
J

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Life with Princess Aduvati and Madame Molly!

I'm still unsure about my feelings for kids!
For most part of my life I've openly said that I will not like to have any children.
And on very few occasions ( Times when I meet friendly kids who I get along with), I've felt my heart say otherwise.

One of these times was when I met Aadu ( Aditi- 7 years) and Molly ( Mallika- 9 years) around a year back. They are my cousin Ganesh and Vrinda's daughters. The first time I met them I was so happy in their company ( and the happiness was also accentuated with a couple of drinks) that I told Ganesh I would love to have daughters like them.


I'm always in a dilemma now a days, whether to join their parents and their friends for a drink or say a quick good night and slip into the girl's bed and tell them bedtime stories!
I love telling them bedtime stories, and I love talking to them!

Now, the first time they asked me to tell a bedtime story, I was confused as to what story to tell them. Especially considering all the complicated stories I make up on my blog. I was very much aware that I did not want to get myself into a story which would scare the hell out of the girls! So the safest story was that of Prince and Princesses. I wanted the story to be interesting, because Molly has already read more than I've read my whole life! She is a voracious reader, and me? I've never read a children's book my whole life. I've jumped from Noddy ( which I started reading in 7th std......( yeah right, have a laugh!!) But I've never been much of a reader!) to Hardy Boys the same year and by the year end got glued to Sidney Sheldon! So there have been no Enid Blyton's, Roald Dahl's, Calvin and Hobbes for me!

Impressing Molly was a difficult task, so I diverted my attention to Aadu who  hasn't yet started reading books and who loves the Barbie and princess related cartoons on the TV.

In order to make it more interesting I named the main Princess as 'Aaduvati'! The first story, about Princess Aaduvati's 7th Birthday was a mess, with loose ends and Molly questioning every now and then about the logic of what I was telling them. Somehow, I ended that story with the Princess getting to wear the most beautiful gown ever made in the whole world, and the maker of that gown was a tailor from Sri Lanka who had picked up beautiful crystals and shiny items from the ocean bed, and with whom the Princess falls in love!


I soon realised that making up a new story every night was very difficult and started avoiding going to bed early with the girls only because they would insist on a story and I couldn't come up with one. So after taking a break of around 5 days, and the girls starting to get disappointed with me and me too missing all the fun of the bedtime story telling decided that it would be a bit simpler to continue with the Princess Aaduvati plot.

So when I declared one night at the dinner table that there's more to Princess Aaduvati, both of them got excited and danced around, and I got loads of sloppy kisses from Aadu!

( By the way, about the picture: We sometimes dress up for the story telling session!)

And so began the story of Princess "Aaduvati" who stayed in "Aaduland" with her parents, the King and the Queen. She was the only child and her parents were very old in comparison to the age of their daughter. This was so because Aaduvati was an adopted child. And what nobody knew was that Aaduvati's real mother was a Witch who was the Queen of a nearby Kingdom called "Witchland".

I don't want to get into the details because the story has already crossed the 15 episodes mark( and that's a lot considering there are no ad's and slow movements and repeated shots and I talk continuously for over an hour) and it has been getting interesting with every episode. I've put everything I've ever watched, read and heard about witches, about magic, about the mystery of life into this story! The story which started as a fun princess story is today at a point where Aaduland was attacked by a nearby kingdom, and the attack was so severe that nobody but Aaduvati could protect her people with her inborn witch powers, and that's when the whole Kingdom realises that their princess is actually a Witch and they turn against her. What would Aaduvati do now? How will she win back her people?
.
.
.


I felt a bit bad that this fab story revolves only around Aadu, and has character names of only her favourite people such as Prince Arnav ( Arnav being one of her favourite pals at school) ,  and so I wanted to weave a story around Molly, but Mollyvati sounds too lame ! For a long time I kept thinking about how I could include her into some story. The answer to that question came just yesterday!

It's Aadu's 7th Birthday today, and we have decorated the house and made it look like a Palace with drapes and lights. Yesterday when I picked up a gift for Aadu, I also found something interesting that Molly would like. When I got them wrapped and had to write the names on the card, for Aadu I wrote " Happy Birthday Princess Aaduvati", I wondered what I should write on Molly's gift? ...After a bit of thinking, I wrote, "To Madame Molly". And that was a start of a new story that I told them yesterday night. The story of Madame Molly and Mrs. Pittsbal!

Madame Molly's story dates back to the 17th century and took place in the suburbs of London. The name Madame might make you think she's old, but no! Madame Molly is the youngest of the 7 children of Sir John Jr and Madame Hazel. Sir John works for the government and they have a palatial house where they live a very lavish life.
The eldest daughter is Jane (21 year old 'Jane' is the English version of my name in this story. So Jane is really me :-),
the second daughter, 19 year old Demi - is the English version of my sister Devaki's name,
the 3rd is a son, 17 year old Austin- taken after the Initial A for Akshay, my bro in law ,
After that comes 15 year old Jack- It's just the name of Leonardo Di Caprio in Titanic,
Then comes 13 year old Kimberly,
11 year old Emma,
and the youngest, naughtiest and the smartest , 9 year old Molly!

This story has had only 1 episode so far in which Sir John runs into some trouble in his office and there are a few misunderstandings and he ends up making dangerous enemies who plan to kill him and one fine day when he's on his way home in his car, a huge truck runs him over and he dies.

Hazel is devastated! She doesn't know how she will take care of 7 kids with 5 of them ( the youngest 5) always getting on to each other's nerves! She rushes to the nearby church and prays to the lord and cries all night long not knowing what to do next. When she wakes up the next day, she rushes back home , worried about her kids.

At home, at the table she finds Jane and Demi pouring coffee and making toast to an old lady whom Hazel can not recognise. The 55 year old lady, introduces herself as Mrs. pittsbal, a governess!
"How will you handle my kids at this age?" asks Hazel.
"Let me spend some time with them and then you will know." Smiles Mrs. Pittsbal.

And she spends not more than 20 minutes with the kids and surprisingly the kids listen to this magical old lady!

The starting of this story is a mix of 'The sound of Music' and some other film  I'd watched long time back, I don't remember the name now. But because there are so many characters in this story, I think it's going to be my playground :-)

Okay, the kids have started arriving at Princess Aaduvati's Palace and I gotta go catch the fun.

Next time, I'll tell you some more about all the fun I have with the kids, also I will talk about the delicious food Vrinda makes for us.....

Today I made this 1st cup cake of my life! 













These are all the cup cakes for the kids!
And the Grand Cake!

It's so tasty.....it's totally Yum!
The first cake I've ever witnessed being made!

I helped to decorate it :-)
And that's both of them again....My sunshines!

If I ever have a dull day, all I gotta do is press the bell of their door and their twinkling eyes and those beautiful smiles will drive my blues away!

Sunday, September 25, 2011

SMS that made my day!

Sometimes we complicate things.....even by being quiet!
Silence is not always understood!

U miss some1?
Call.

Wanna meet?
Invite!

Wanna b understood?
xplain urself!

Have questions?
Ask.

Don't like it?
Say it.

Like it?
State it.

U r in d mood?
Do it.

Want something?
Ask in d best possible way to get a yes.

If u already have a "no", have the courage to let go.

We just have one life....

Do what makes u happy!

This love has taken its toll!

Take the latest case of Malini Murmu's death.


For the past couple of days a lot is being talked about how her boy friend posted a status message about their break up on his facebook wall , following which the girl hit a depression and ended her life!

I watched the film, The Social Network last year and was shocked to learn how FB was invented and especially "The lack of sense" displayed by its founder ,Mark Zuckerberg!

FB aint a social network, its an anti-social network!
Because you can't trust the world to be at its best all by themselves! It's a jungle out there, and we so called humans are , in fact, just animals, and we are showing our true colours on sites such as FB!

In the first few minutes of the film, we see Mark dating a young girl, with whom he doesn't speak a sentence decently, ( I don't understand what happened to that breed called 'gentleman'...are they extinct??), and the girl gets fed up with his insults and weird behaviour and leaves. To which our youngest billionaire responds by blogging in the following terms,


"Erica Albright’s a bitch. Do you think
that’s because her family changed their
name from Albrecht or do you think it’s
because all B.U. girls are bitches?

For the record, she may look like a 34C
but she’s getting all kinds of help from
our friends at Victoria’s Secret. She’s a
34B, as in barely anything there. False
advertising."

In comparison to such language, Abhishek Dhan hasn't done half a crime!

Every newspaper, blog, comment is talking of thrashing Mr.Dhan. But wait a minute, is Abhishek the only person responsible for this free media which allows each one of us to take out our frustrations the way we want??

Is Abhishek responsible for Malini's weak EQ?

Do we know Malini left a note that said* (something to the effect of),  My death is the best revenge for Abhishek.

It looks like both of them were very much in a mentally abusive relationship, while he posted a message on his wall to piss her off, she went ahead of it all and ended her life!



How can we lay the entire blame on a boy , who broke up with his girl friend?

How can we take justice in our hands?

All of us have fallen in love, and out of it...have faced break ups, or have broken up, if Abhishek Dhan is guilty for the death of his girl friend, so is each one of us.

People over the centuries have committed suicides for various reasons, yes, many of them did so because of cruel people and situations around them.
Life isn't easy on some and difficult on others, life is life, for all of us!
And we all know that some of the most revered leaders and social Heroes have come out of some of life's most difficult circumstances.
Now a days we want to win, but we don't want to suffer any pain.
There's no gain without any pain my darling, haven't you ever heard of that?

So let's toughen up our hearts, and face the world!
Yes life sucks!
Yes the society laughs at us when we are the weakest!
And people kick our ass when we most need them!
So what?

Have the guts to show your middle finger to those who laugh at you, if you don't have those guts, go ahead, hang yourselves!

Laws and social welfare/development can never cushion you so much till nobody can hurt you any more. People in all walks and societies will always try to hit at you with their best weapon, isn't life all about facing that challenge and being prepared and hitting back with whatever you have in you?

I want to make it clear here, that I'm not on Abhishek's side, nor am I on Malini's side.
But I do want to tell the likes of Malini, who might now think after how much trouble Abhishek has gotten himself into for being nasty to her, that this is the best revenge to such boyfriends, that please wait a minute and think, Life isn't about 1 love, life isn't about a couple of years..........some months down the lane Malini will be forgotten and so will be Abhishek!

There's nothing more important than your life,
It's a gift!
So treasure it please!












* http://news.oneindia.in/2011/09/22/iimb-girl-suicide-boyfriend-met-malini-before-death.html

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Have you seen a clear night sky?




I never get "Random Thoughts" by nature, it has to be someone else making random statements for me to wander off in that direction. And when it comes to 'Randomness', "Alphus Rockey" rules the roost! After all , he's Alphus 'Random' Rockey while I am Janaki 'Confused' Sincro, so you can imagine where his randomness can lead me to. Sometimes our conversations lead me to a state of mind that ends me with morbid dreams!


Our conversations are as good as a drug dose for me, as I get a hangover the very next day.


So yesterday night, he asked me this question, "What do you feel when you see a clear night sky?"

So I laid down on the lawn to completely feel it, to answer the question.

The sky was clear yesterday night.




"So? What do you feel? Apart from appreciating the beauty of it of course..."


"Only if you stop talking will I feel something.....wait now...let me listen to my heart...."


And so I looked at the sky, and the million stars, and ignored all that was around me, ignored the fact that I was lying down on the lawn at 9.30pm at night, and that if the security had seen me like that, they would probably come running to see what I'm doing....I took a deep long breath, (and apart from the traffic noise somewhere far away), could hear my own breathing, and I could sense some slow sad music going on in my head!




" I hear some slow music......."




"Okay....and?"




" Alphus, I'm getting a feeling of a very deep sense of loss! As if I'm lost somewhere....


I think I've never felt too happy looking at a clear night sky with stars......they are so many of them....


I feel lonely.....as my eyes see the familiar patterns in the sky, my mind cant make any sense of my life and my goals and my being alive!


As if the very next moment I'm going to die, as if I'm breathing my last!"


"Hmmm........and the moon? What do you feel when you see the moon?"


" The moon is my friend! No matter how lost I am, if I see the moon I smile. I know him, he knows me!"


"Nice...that's kind of deep...The emotion that you are feeling is called "feeling insignificant"

"What do you mean?"

"Imagine u have a map, its like any other map, but only difference is that this one shows all of Creation with its limitless stars and planets and infinitive emptiness of space, and it also shows You, a dot about 1/100th the size of a pin prick and it marks you out with a sign in Bold letters saying "THIS IS YOU". If u had such a map what would be the first thing that comes to your mind?"

"I'm so small"

" Exactly.....hence Insignificant! Now let me ask you a different question...."


"No!"


"Why not?"


" Because I'm lost in the sky........ "


"Okay.......Look, you might be feeling quite peaceful there, but I aint watching the stars right now, so...next question!"


"No next questions, all the noise from your side is disturbing my thought process....let's hang up now."


"This is what I don't like about you, you get lost in our conversations and can't Come back!"


"No.......I feel divine! Good night Alphus, we'll talk tomorrow!"


" Nonsense! No random conversations with you any more. Bye."






(Song) "Growing in numbers
Growing in speed
Can't fight the future
Can't fight what I see

People they come together
People they fall apart
No one can stop us now
'Cause we are all made of stars'

Efforts of lovers
Left in my mind
I sing in the reaches
We'll see what we find


Slowly rebuilding
I feel it in me
Growing in numbers
Growing in peace


People they come together
People they fall apart
No one can stop us now
'Cause we are all made of stars"





Security: Madamji , aap thik ho?

Me(waking up): Huh? Wha??

Security: Madamji , gyaarah baj rahe hain, aur aap yahan lawn pe so rahe ho?


(Madam, are you alright? It's 11 pm and you are sleeping outside on the lawn?")










"We are all made of stars" by Moby





Sunday, August 14, 2011

Jai Hind! (55-er)

"Maverick" she was!
Society laughed at her hair styles, dress code and make up.

With great difficulty, her mother found a respectable man who was ready to marry her.

The day they met, before he could speak, she asked him, "You have a government job?"

"Yes."

"Do you take bribes?"

"Yes."

She was outta there!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Welcome to the City!

Silk Board Junction in Bengaluru is well known for its heavy traffic jams. Even after a flyover has been built connecting directly to the Electronic city, the traffic isn't any less at the Junction and at times one finds oneself stuck at the signal for as long as 15 minutes during rush hours.

Sneha's route was typically J.P Nagar to Marathahalli where she worked and back to J.P Nagar where she stayed. For 2 years she had traveled by buses and now had bought herself a bike, which was not for use to go to office everyday but mainly to avoid getting into arguments with auto drivers on weekends, who are well known for screwing up the meters to charge more fare, which in turn leads to a lot of stress, and inconvenience to the commuters. But why would the Government care to look into the matter? Heck! They don't even care about the flyover constructions on the outer ring road taking forever and causing so much inconvenience to the commuters everyday!

Even after paying the highest road tax in India, this is what we get! Pollution, traffic jams, construction work everywhere on the road, poorly built service roads, no proper traffic / danger/ construction signs where construction work is happening. The other day Sneha almost drove into a big pit at the end of the road, which was not barricaded or covered with any warning signs. Sneha felt she had been given a 2nd chance at life after not lending into the pit, thanks to her super quick brakes! Roads are bad but the automobile industry is doing a great job considering all the odds.

This week was a tough one. There were deadlines to meet and Sneha was getting her bike to office every day. No...not because of the deadlines but because once you get used to a vehicle, its difficult to want to go standing all the way in an over crowded bus. You tend to like the dust and the pollution over the sweat around you.

She thought she would try to enjoy the bike rides, sing a song while riding or think about what work needs to be done, or reflect on where life is going etc etc. But no....The crazy traffic doesn't let you do anything other than think which is the sleekest way to get ahead of the cars, trucks and other bikes standing in front of you and you try so hard for over 20 minutes , with all your driving skills and confidence only to find you are bloody running a rat race. The woman you supposedly crossed over 10 minutes back is now riding with you. Fuck! You got nowhere!

What's worse?

Riding in this traffic only to find you are really getting nowhere, or working in that lame IT office environment day in and day out , and get nowhere and feel nothing by the end of weeks and months and years??

Tough choice!

Everyday Sneha went around these same topics in her head while riding and she was starting to get irritated!
"Oh come on! There has to be more to a city than the salary you get paid at the end of the month!"
Now a days she couldn't find a reason for her living in a city.
She looked at the life of her friends back home. Happily settled with a family, and a job. The job might not be paying them as much as hers paid her. It might not have growth opportunities as her job had. But, you also don't get unnecessarily stressed with traffic and pollution! Half of your life spent in commuting! Does it make any sense at all?

"Excuse me?"
Sneha's thought process was disturbed by someone standing with a bike besides her.
"Yes?"
He was a boy with a blue checked shirt. That's all she noticed of him in the first look. The blue checks. She loved his shirt.
"Don't think I'm a stalker, but I've seen you around many times. Maybe our time of commuting is the same. You work in Vrindavan Tech Park right?"
"Yes"
"I work there too."
"Oh!Which company?"

Just then the signal turned green or in other words, it said," Get Set Go" ,and all the vehicles rushed as if there was a million dollar prize for them at the end of the road.

Sneha took her own sweet time to navigate her way. Every now and then she could see the blue checked shirt riding somewhere around her. Sometimes he would be completely out of sight, and she would ride a bit faster, try to locate him, and when he came back into sight, there was a relief of some sort.
Blue checked shirt preferred the service roads to the jammed main roads while Sneha usually stuck to the main road.....whichever roads they took, almost every time they ended up being somewhere around each other, but never next to each other. Whenever they were stuck in a traffic, they looked at each other and smiled, but were too far away to talk to each other.

In the next 30 minutes, blue checks was lost somewhere and Sneha could not locate him at all.

She reached her Tech Park and parked her bike in her company parking lot.
As she walked from the parking lot to her desk, she though, "This day feels different!"
Funny as it may sound, a few sentences exchanged with a stranger had brought a whole new perspective about the way she perceived life in this city.
Suddenly she was looking forward to ride back home in the expectation that she would see him again, and maybe ask his name??
Why? Had she liked him?
No...not really. she wasn't so foolish to fall in love at 1st sight.
Then why was her world painted in red today?
She couldn't tell.
She couldn't tell  why!

The deadlines were over, and so was the week. She made it a point to start from home at the same time every day, but for the next 2 weeks, she did not see him anywhere on the road. She knew his bike number. But he was nowhere in sight.
Had he lied that he was a regular commuter?
Did something happen to him?
Is he alive?
Was he a dream?
Am I sane??

That was the only question that haunted her in week 3. "Am I sane?"

"Miss Sen!"
She was startled out of her reverie as her colleague called out to her.

"Yes Varun?"
"Where are you lost?"
 She turned to look at her laptop and realized why Varun asked such a question. She had been looking at the screen saver, god knows for how long!
"Nowhere!"
She tapped the mouse to get back to her work.

Varun came closer to her cubicle.
"So Sneha.......what is it?"
"What is what Varun?", She kept her eyes fixed on her monitor. While he kept his eyes fixed on her.
"Who's he?"
"Who's who?"
"The guy you have been thinking about for quite a long time now??"
"I don't think about any guy Varun."
"Okay then....the girl you have been thinking about for quite a long time now?" He joked, she picked up a spare magazine and threw at him.
"Coffee?"
"No thank you."

Varun nagged her a bit more and then left her alone knowing that she wouldn't budge. She had started feeling helplessly foolish about this whole scenario. She had been in a few relationships before, she wasn't the "Never been kissed" types, and she knew better than those romantic fairy tale stuff that young girls love all the time. But still, she couldn't do anything to keep her heart from searching for the one.

The next day, she decided she would not take the bike to office. What with her eyes scanning each and every bike number, she felt as if she was on some mission impossible! She walked to her usual bus stop and got into the familiar bus. There was no place to sit, as always. But now she preferred the sweat smell to her ride through the polluted rugged roads as if she was a secret spy, a CIA agent. She had started making a fool out of herself on that episode now. All she remembered was his bike number and the checked shirt. She couldn't even remember how he looked. She had even gone to the extent of googling 'who wears blue checked shirt' and found no logical answer to the question. Unknowingly she started smiling and later chuckling, a few ladies and men standing besides her turned to look at her. But she couldn't stop. The whole episode was so damn funny. She started laughing now, uncontrollably, tears rolling down her cheeks....people around her thought she was insane. She tried to explain through her laughs and tears, "Gosh...I can't stop laughing...my god! This is so funny! I....... ( laughs, chuckles, tears, laugh ) God...I've.....( laughs, chuckles), can't believe myself!" A few young girls besides her started laughing as well. For whole 5 minutes she laughed as if she had been granted the right to laugh for the first time in her life. So she made a quick decision to get down from the bus and return home because she totally doubted her mental status. The conductor let her get down, and everyone looked at her with amazement. When the bus passed by, she settled down and stopped laughing. Took 2 deep breaths. She kept standing at the side of the Outer Ring Road, in the middle of nowhere. She looked down at her feet  and kept looking there.
"Hi."
She looked up.
"Yes?"
"I heard you laughing in the bus."
" Great! And you thought I was mad."
"No...just that it was the most amazing laughter I've ever heard."
"Thanks..but I feel like such a fool!", She looked away.

He gave her some time and then asked,
"coffee?"
" Is there any coffee shop at all around here?", she was quick to answer and looked around.
" We'll have to walk a little to get there. Mind it?"

He looked descent. Specs with a black geeky frame, curly hair, fair skin tone , a bit plump but a reassuring face and a cute smile.
"I'm Sneha ." She extended her hand.
"I'm Jaydeep."

They walked to the coffee shop and sat there 4 whole hours talking. Talking about anything and everything.

And so she realized once again why she loved the city so much.

In cities, you meet people, you make friends, some go on to be life long friends, some just for a few minutes. But it is the city where anything and everything is possible. It's the city which offers you the world of your dreams.

Nobody cares whether you laugh or you cry.
Or that you are in love or you have fallen out of it.
They don't care.

And that's nice in a way, because you aren't judged 24x7 on your every word spoken and every step taken. You can go whichever way you like. You can go wrong- knowingly, unknowingly, foolishly....whatever.
No silly rules and traditions bind you. No-one sees you holding hands with some random guy and report it back home.You can act foolish and that wouldn't be held against you for the rest of your life.



You see this isn't a post about a love story.
It's a post about the life in a city the way I see it.
The anonymity, the mystery, the opportunity, the adventure, the freedom......it's just too much goodness against issues like pollution, noise and crowd.


A. I would rather have my lungs full of smoke and dust then have it full of unsaid hidden desires.
B. I would rather have  all the noise outside on the road then have unwanted people crowd my brain with advice,suggestion,taunts, and comments!
C. And finally I would rather be lost in an anonymous crowd then be crowded by people I hardly care for!

This - A, B and C is the real pollution, noise and crowd that I would always guard myself against!

I love the city- Whether it's Bengaluru, Mumbai or Pune!
I just totally love it here!







Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Strange Relationships

In KFC, They sat at a table facing the whole crowd, so that he could check out the girls and she could check out the boys.They were really good friends, ex's actually, but due to some problems somewhere, things couldn't be worked out and they had accepted the fact after initial hesitation and decided to move on as good friends. It wasn't too long back since their break up, but they did meet up once in a while, things were cooling down, it seemed.

"Check that one in your right." he turned the whole way to his right,almost looking backwards to see the girl.
"Not so much right stupid......At around 2o'clock." She specified the position and he caught sight of the girl.
"What about her?" He asked.
"You don't find her good?",she was surprised.
"She is okay..."
"Why? Just because she is in a salwaar? Only a girl in skimpy clothes can look hot according to you or what?", He wondered why Shalini couldn't let go at times, why she had to know the reason behind each and every opinion.
"I did not say she's hot, nor did I say she is bad......I just said she is okay! I mean she is attractive, rest I don't know yet."
Shalini looked at Kunal with a surprised look,"You don't have to know the rest Mr. This fun shun is meant only for the pleasure of your eyes, nothing more.", She sounded a bit possessive.

The girl in question sat alone at the table. looked like she was nervous and waiting for someone.

"I'm so sure she is not here with her boy friend." Shalini was back talking about the same girl.
"Why so?"
"Look at the expression on her face. Girls who come here with their boy friends usually carry an attitude, or that they smile at themselves because they are so much in their own world. But look at her, she seems kind of bored! "

Kunal shot her another look," She isn't bored. She's anxious."

"Really? About what?"

Just then a fat woman came with a tray filled with coke and other food stuff and laid it before the girl and sat down next to her.
" Anxious about how to finish off all that food eh?" Shalini joked sipping on her coke.

"That's her mother. And she is here to meet her prospective son in law.", Kunal said confidently. Shalini decided to play along.
"In KFC? Is this a place for such occasions?"
"This is a place for all occasions my friend. I would be really comfortable meeting a prospective wife to be in KFC rather than some posh restaurant where it's really quiet and tidy and formal and all that."
Shalini thought for a while," Yeah. You are right. This informal environment helps to calm down.Yet she's so nervous. Imagine how nervous she would be in a formal setting!"

"Oh come on. This is her 1st time, plus she's really young. Just 21." Kunal's eyes were glowing with confidence now.
"What's making you so happy?As if you are their prospective..?" She nudged him.
"As a matter of fact ....", He got up from his seat, tidied his shirt a bit, "I am. Excuse me for a while, will you?"
"Yeah right." Shalini smiled and got back to her burger. But from the corner of her eyes she saw Kunal walking up to the table. She kept watching him, not knowing what to do. She was frozen in her seat, with that burger in her hands as she saw Kunal walking up to the 2 ladies and striking a conversation and then taking a seat on that table.

As minutes passed by, the reality dawned on her.
Kunal had actually come here to meet his prospective wife to be. He knew all along, everything about the very girl Shalini chose as her target for her comments. Shalini felt betrayed, foolish and sad all at the same time. Yes they were 'Just Friends' now, but it was hardly 2 months back that they had broken up. And just a week since they had started speaking again. She wanted to give their relationship another shot, she wanted to try and make it work. Because those 2 months after they broke up, had really given her the time to evaluate the situation. She was 27. It wasn't too early for marriage. Why had she declined his proposal? Ambition, dreams....they could be fulfilled all along. But the right man? Would he come along again? Kunal was everything she ever wanted, almost everything. And she was sure she would never come that close to her specifications again. She wanted to get married in her 30's...she wanted Kunal to wait. But he had said the pressure at his home was too much and that he wouldn't be able to argue with his old parents about it. Does that mean you say a yes to the 1st girl your parents choose for you?

Shalini looked at the girl. She looked good, simple and well dressed. The girl was smiling at Kunal's jokes now and Shalini could tell this meeting would be successful if it's let to proceed without any interruptions. This was the moment of truth, this was the time to decide. Shalini realized this was her last chance at winning the boy she was in love with. She got up from her seat and started walking towards the table, not knowing what her strategy to deal with the situation would be. She reached the table and stood there.

Kunal, the girl and the mother looked up at her. The mother was the 1st to talk, "Yes? What do you want?"
Shalini took a deep breath. She did not look at Kunal.
"I want him." She pointed at him.
Kunal jerked off his seat and got up, "Shardaji, this is my friend, Shalini. You were a bit late in coming here so I joined her at her table and we were chatting for a while."

Kunal signalled Shalini with his eyes to get lost. But Shalini seemed fixed in her place as if someone had applied Fevicol to her shoes.
"I am not just a friend. I'm his girl friend. And I don't know why he's doing this to me?" She broke down and started crying. Within seconds, everybody in KFC was quiet and looking at her. Kunal had never seen Shalini cry before, not even when they broke up had she cried. He had thought she's not human at all at some points. She wasn't like the other women he had known.

" How can you be so insensitive Kunal? Why do I have to say everything in words for you to understand? Don't you see it in my eyes? Don't you understand it by my behaviour? Have you ever seen me cooking for anybody? Didn't I cook for you? Didn't I wait for you ? I did your shopping and I cleaned up your cupboards. If this isn't my love for you then what is? All I asked was your time Kunal. And all it took for you to say a no to me was one argument. No trying, No struggling.......A No from my side and it's all over? I want you . I want you for my life and I'll fight to get you, come what may. I don't care if these people feel I'm so foolish and shameless. Yes I'm shamelessly making a scene here and begging you to not leave me Kunal. I'm not so strong as I show myself to be. I won't be able to carry on without you. I'll survive but I won't live my life. Please don't do this to me Kunal. Please."

She turned and walked out of KFC as fast as she could. She caught the 1st Auto she saw and was gone within seconds. The focus of the people at KFC now turned to Kunal. It was as if the crowd waited for his explanation or answer or something from him.

Kunal cleared his throat,"Vidya is my 2nd cousin who is in love with a man 15 years elder to her and who made the stupid decision of dropping out of college in her final sem to get married to him. I'm trying to fix the situation."

"Did you have to spoil my name in public to save your ass Kunal bhaiyya?" Vidya stood up, furious!

"So you do realize that what you've done is wrong." Kunal looked straight at Vidya, she sat down, " But I don't know what to do now? I'm so screwed up!"

"I'll deal with you later, first I've to go and talk to my lady love. It took her 5 years to realize that she is in love with me. Bye Shardachachi, will call you later." He rushed out of KFC.

"Thanks a lot Kunal....bless you both." Shardachachi turned to see her daughter, " Here's you who did not take a second to fall in love with the wrong man and there's Shalini who couldn't realize she was with the right man until she almost lost him....strange generation yours is!"








Friday, June 24, 2011

When you're gone...

Rakesh calls me today..., "Hey J, just wanted to tell you...I'm going to Dubai in 2 weeks time."
"Hey...That's nice...When will you be back?"
"Hmm....I don't know J......I don't think I'll be back!"

And then I listen to the reasons he had for leaving, and I'm lost in thoughts.

I remember Joseph calling me some weeks back, "Hey Janaki, when can we meet this week?"
"Hmm.. I dunno Joseph...Got a couple of tests this week."
"Hmm...too bad! I'm leaving for Kerala!"
"Okay.. so we'll meet when you get back!"
"Naah...This is my final goodbye to this city! So wanted to meet you before I leave."

I remember the SMS I got a week back from Anoop,"Got a  job in UK, leaving B'lore...Leavin India! Too bad couldn't say a goodbye by meeting you, too busy! You take care!"

And Ashwini," Hey my Husband's going on-site for a year...and guess what? I'm going with him!"

And Danish is going on-site in 2 weeks,
And N,
My closest,dearest friend Navdeep too is going back home...forever!

Every single friend I made last year....Is going away......Is Gone!
Never to return back,
never to share a joke,
never to take that quick tea break around the corner,
never to argue and fight,
never to brain-storm.....

You know, it's just been a year since I've known these people..not too long, is it?
But these were the 1st few friends I made in Bengaluru...they are the people who made living in a city worth the effort!
Rakesh, the only film-buddy in the city I know,
Ashwini, the girl who aspires to be a CS just like me,
Anoop, the co-blogger,
Joseph, the legal friend,
Danish, the neighbour,
And Navdeep.....can't fit him in 1 role ever!

I feel like I'm starting all over again in the city...I'm feeling empty as these were some wonderful friends I made!
This, in a way , is what I'd hoped for when I left Goa....I hoped to meet new people and make new friends, move to a new place every year and explore- the world around and inside of me!
But it's so hard to let go of the ties I made....it's as if , with each one of them, I leave a part of me.
I'm not used to letting go of people so soon.
But maybe it's for the best.
Whatever little time I spent with these people, was wonderful and memorable!

Maybe it's time once again to start a new journey, same city, but unknown world!




Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Janaki "Confused" Sincro!

She enters the salon and stands there, trying to remember why she entered it in the 1st place. Her mind is still on some of the eye liners she had seen in the earlier shop.

The Salon ladies are busy on their clients applying the face pack, threading, massaging the hair...

She looks back once again, and realizes she cannot go out before she finishes her work here. Some of the Salon ladies look up now, expecting her to say something. So she looks around for some help and finds what she needed...The L'Oreal Shampoo.

"I need this shampoo." She points out to a cream color bottle.

"Just the shampoo or also the conditioner?" One of the salon lady asks her.

"Wait a min." She dials the number of her friend who had asked her to get the shampoo,

" I told you I just need the shampoo, I already have the conditioner!" The friend says.

But at that very time she is looking at the different colors of the bottles in front of her, she is wondering , if she had a bit more money, which bottle she would have bought. She carelessly says a 'okay' to her friend and asks for the shampoo again, "How much is the shampoo for?"

"It's 475 ma'am, it is to be used with the conditioner for best results. Shall I give the conditioner as well?"

She is confused again. She knows very well that her friend had given her specific instructions before starting from home, then once again after she called to confirm, just seconds ago....but what were the instructions? She cannot remember.

"Wait a sec." She calls her friend again, who's busy working on some important issue at work, " What?", The friend demands.

How do I ask her the same question again?  She wonders for a moment before asking, " Did you say just the shampoo or just the conditioner? or both?"

The friend wonders what's wrong with this girl? So she says, " If it's too difficult for you to remember then just come home. Don't get anything. I'll look for it myself."

"No just this last time. What do you want?"

"Get me the fucking SHAMPOO!", The friend replies, irritated and frustrated and slams down the phone. This isn't the 1st time she has behaved this way, she always seems lost somewhere.

So she pays for the fucking SHAMPOO and comes out of the salon. On her way back she remembers the Cadbury Five star Ad with the tag line "Jo khaaye, kho jaaye!" and the two friends calling out to each other again and again after every bite- "Ramesh n Suresh".

So she smiles to herself on her absent mindedness and just then the phone rings again and its her friend calling and she thinks, "Oh fuck! She had asked me to buy some shampoo!" And she turns around swiftly, making a run to the salon and picks up the call on the way, panting, "I'm just on my way to get your shampoo, wait!" and cuts the call.

And the friend on the line thinks," WTF?"

(That's Di n me-in one of my mischievous moods)


I'm a child in your arms

Yesterday morning when I went for my tuition class, my teacher's son was getting ready for school. He's just 4 years old. He's usually playful around the house, greeting me whenever I enter the house, giving me a mischievous smile or simply shying and running away inside.

But the usually playful boy looked worried today. His eyes were set on the road and he stood fixed to the window, waiting. The moment his school van arrived, his eyes saddened. He turned to his mom and asked her, "Will I be back home from school maa? Will I see you again?", and his mom, my teacher, lovingly picked him up in her arms and kissed him on his cheek and assured him that he will be back home soon, that his friends are waiting for him in the van , that he will have a great time playing with them and then get back home to play with his maa.

That expression of worry in his eyes and his innocent questions made me realize that the girl watching him, 21 years elder to him, felt the same fear in her heart when she said a simple 'bye' to the one she cares. It's the same question her heart asks, "Won't you come back to me? Won't I see you again?"

Maybe some kid in the little boy's school played a prank on him and told him once he goes to school, he will never return home again.
Whereas my fear is not based on some hearsay, its based on experience....that people turn around too quickly, that nothing lasts forever.

Love feels so good because it takes one back to one's childhood.
One can be innocent and naive,
one can cry and laugh like an idiot,
one can sing the way one likes and move one's body like a mad man and call it a dance move.



And In this whole wide world,there is just one person with whom I can be the child I am. And I'm so scared to lose that child in me, I'm so scared to lose that comfort, those loving hugs that tell me every thing's alright, that kiss that tells me I'm still loved, I'm still wanted and that we will be together, like the promise of a mother....I would so like to believe this dream was true, that there can be someone other than a mother who cares as much...

My heart is torn between reality and the dream.
My heart is stuck between promises and hollow words.
But this undying hope, that things will turn around, refuses to die.
The child in me waits for my hand to be held and to be guided.

Maybe it's just a bad day at school, over stretched into days, months and years and that van which took me there will get me back home, and there will be someone who will be waiting for me, worrying for me and someone who will say, "Where were you all this time? I have been waiting!"








All images from Google Image Search.



Friday, April 22, 2011

Bonus Day!

What do you call a day that is super charged?
A day that fills you up with energy and excitement and hope and happiness!
And it's not that I won a prize or anything,
It's not my birthday nor did I gain anything....
It's just simple pleasure in seeing people who matter to me be happy!

My dance teacher, Ms.Lalan Dessai had a super show presented in Goa, and the people absolutely loved it, they gave her a standing ovation! I felt bad that I missed the show due to prior commitments, but I'm so damn happy for her...I feel so happy when someone who deserves credit, appreciation and fame gets it. Because in our world, its so rare to see someone really deserving getting a chance to prove oneself!

I feel truly blessed.I do not know what is the reason for so much happiness throughout the day, but I love it when life looks absolutely fantastic and full of opportunities!

It's not that life's problems have ceased to trouble me, they are there, they will always be there. But it's like I got a sneak peek into a world beyond those stresses...and I realized I spend so much time worrying that I forget to look a bit further and enjoy life, to feel blessed and happy as I feel today.

I wanted to share this happiness with everyone, I wanted this "Happiness Disease" to engulf the whole world, just for a day! Maybe it's not god sitting up there and managing the world matters today, maybe it's "Bruce" who granted all of us our wishes just because he was too bored to go through each one of them personally.
Because all I wanted was to feel happy!
All Lalan wanted was for her show and her hard work to be appreciated!
All that Sim wanted, was to relax and take a chill pill about what lies ahead!
Many of us here in Blore wanted the city to cool down a bit so that we can enjoy a good night's sleep, and it rained and it's nice and cold outside!

Who said there's no god?
Who said prayers are not answered?
Just dare to wish dear, and your wish will be granted!



Thursday, April 21, 2011

Happy Belated Birthday Dear Blog!

Dearest Sincro Station,

Your mommy is too busy to care, sorry, I forgot your birthday!
On 7th April you became 2 years old!

I still remember that day when you were born. I don't think I ever shared that story with you. I was young and restless, trapped and in pain. I wanted to express, I wanted to scream and shout and run and hide and never ever let anybody catch me, never ever let anybody hurt me.....but it was too difficult at that time to just be myself and come out in the open and tell the world, "Look... this is me! You like it or not, I don't give a shit about what you think!"

At that time my words were  limited to my diary, and they were a tearful story of the caging of my soul!  It was Sharvani, my best friend who introduced me to the world of blogging. She had her own blog, my sister too has her own blog, but somehow I was too scared to start one, too doubtful about what I should write?

"Write anything you want!"
Sharvani showed me what she wrote, what di wrote, what some other random unknown people wrote....

I thought and thought that whole night.
The next morning at 8 am, I had my Bharatnatyam class and that's where I found my 1st blog post "Guru".

Thanks to the solid support of friends and faithful readers,I got a good response and I kept writing, experimenting, being myself and opening up to the world.

Sometimes I didn't know what to do with you...I was confused, I was lost. But most of the times, you have been the reason for making many of my days, you have been the reason for boosting my confidence and my imagination and the reason for me to keep my faith in my dreams!

Today, after 2 years, you have become such an important part of my life, that even after cutting every other connection to the virtual world , I couldn't stop caring for you, you are mine, and there's no-one better than me who can nurture you.

I hope you grow up, slowly and steadily and I hope we will make a wonderful team who can entertain ourselves and the world!

Wish you a very Happy Birthday SS!

Thanks to the almighty: i.e Blogger, for giving me this wonderful experience!

Love you always,
Muuaahh!

Mommy J

P.S: As a Birthday Present , I will gift you a new look, and I hope you will like it!

A Note For the Readers

Dear Readers,

If you can help me out with a new look, new template , an exciting new widget maybe, i would really be thankful because I'm really bad with these sort of technical things.

I'm waiting for your suggestions and comments, so that I can gift my baby the look as soon as possible :-)

Love

J

Monday, April 11, 2011

It's just a little crush!

I woke up in the morning with a start and thought about my dream last night. "How foolish of me , I'm 25 and get these kinda childish dreams......really, I need to grow up!"

I don't like watching or playing cricket, have never been fond of that game or the people who play it. I do not know who makes the cricket team presently except for a few unignorable facts such as who's the Captain, that Sachin still plays and plays well, there are a few new boys like Kohli ( This I know because of the Fastrack Ad), and other gossip news such as Sreesanth had once cried because Bhajji slapped him , and other controversies that Bhajji gets himself into.

I happened to watch some of the matches in this World Cup, not because I wanted to, but because I just love to be around an excited group of people, and yes I love to scream!

In the last 2 matches, I watched this Indian batsman, and I did not know his name then, I cannot comment on how he plays because I don't understand the game. All I know is that he put up a rather impressive show at the finals and the next night I see him in my dreams!

The Dream:

We both are sitting in a Merry Go Round, in some sort of a fair and he is talking to me continuously about how exciting it was to win the world cup and be a part of the team and all this time we are going round and round, and that ride doesn't seem to come to an end nor does his cricket talk!

"Can you talk something other than Cricket?" I finally ask him.
"Why?"
"Don't you see I'm bored?"
"Are you an Indian?" he asks.
"What do you mean?"
"How can you not like cricket?"
"That way I also don't like fish but I'm a Goan!",I argue back.
"What else you want to talk about?", He asks me.
"Something that won't bore me!"
"You are not being clear. Tell me what you want to talk about..."

Guess what's my answer to this! Sheesh!

"You and me!"

The next ,I just saw his blank expression and then I woke up!

I wondered why I dreamt of him, of all the people, why Gambhir?

When was the last time I dreamt of a celebrity? Oh I had a huge crush on Leonardo Di Caprio when I had watched Titanic, and then it was Siddharth from Rang De Basanti( But he never really came in my dreams).
But that was way back in school, and now I'm no more a small girl, I'm a woman and I cannot believe I could fantasize a celebrity. After that dream, every time I do see this man on the TV , I find myself paying all the attention and a little smile lightens up my face!

I asked my sister the other day, " Guess who's my new crush? It's someone you know!"
She took a few names I might be interested in and I said, " Naah! He's not a regular guy....", With a kind of royal stint to the dialogue.
"And where did you meet this irregular guy?"

"It's Gautam Gambhir!", I ended the question round!
She lost the interest in the conversation knowing its useless to talk of such crushes, she laughed, "Best of Luck then!"

I feel foolish at times, but at other times, I feel its so much safer to have a crush on a celebrity....at least for a while. You know you don't get him, you know your heart won't be broken! It's a no risk situation! Something like parking the heart in a well locked garage!

I don't want to read about him on Wiki. Rather I ask about him to my friends, and some of them speak about him as if they know this guy personally. It's kind of funny, our own little joke, but for now it's working! Till I give my final exams this year end and I add that extra qualification to my name, I want to keep my heart safe and sound with Mr. Gautam Gambhir......., but hey, It's just a little crush ;-)

Friday, April 8, 2011

The Village Witch ( The concluding part)

It was true that they had got their daughter back, but in their hearts they knew something was wrong!
Anjali was distant, she was too mature for her age, she wasn't the happy chirpy girl everyone knew anymore. Her eyes scanned everyone, and made them feel naked, as if she knew their darkest secrets, she knew behind those fake smiles lied discontent, hatred and pain.

After she was all well to face the public, the village gathered to see her, ask her what the witch had tried to do to her, and decide as to what is to be done with the dead witch's body. It was Anjali's suggestion that was finally taken, that Meghna's body be cremated in the usual Hindu tradition of burning the body on a funeral pyre. "She deserves the last rites!", Anjali had said.

Anjali personally looked after the last rites of Meghna.

With her physical form gone up in smoke, and being present in her new body , the only resemblance or the sign of who she really was , were her curly long hair. Her mother had asked her father the moment Anjali was brought into the house in an unconscious state..," What happened to my Anji's beautiful silky straight hair?"
Shankar had not replied to that...he had thought a long time about it and then made peace with the reason that the face off that happened between both the girls must be the cause of sudden change.

Early morning the next day, Anjali was all ready with her bags packed and her air tickets in hands.
"I have to fly tomorrow. I have already wasted enough time here."
"Don't you think you should relax for a while Anji? Your father already spoke to your HR about your condition."
"I called them early morning today. I told them everything is fine now, and that I want to join as soon as possible. They said they had an urgent requirement in Washington DC right now, they want me to assist their correspondent who's covering the news of the White House."

"I thought you hated broadcasting. I thought you wanted to shift  to entertainment  Anji." Shankar had heard everything that was being spoken.
" Yes. Who said I am getting back to broadcasting? It's just that its a good opportunity for a new comer to work under a good correspondent , that too around the power house of the world!"

Shankar looked at his daughter for a long time, he could see it, why she was going to DC. She stared back flatly. Then picked up her bags and called out to the driver.
"Wait...are you leaving right now? We are coming with you."
"It's okay maa. I'm a big girl." She left the house hitting her heels hard against the wooden flooring. Not stopping to take blessings from her parents, not even stopping to turn and look back.
Her mother wanted to say something, Shankar held her hand,"Let her go."
"What?"
"I said let her go! Are you dumb or what? Don't you get it? She's not our daughter!" He stormed up to his room in desperation.
Her mother was left to fend for herself...what should she believe? What she sees and what her heart and her husband says? Or just blindly believe the face of her daughter?

In the car, Anjali dialled a number, " Hello,  Adv. Kapoor's office? Hi..I have a matter that I want to discuss with him, what time can I see him? My name is Meg...sorry, Anjali. Is it possible sometime tomorrow morning because I have a flight to catch later tomorrow and the matter is urgent. Alright. Thank you so much. This is regarding name change and making a Power of Attorney. Thanks a lot. I'll be there at 10."

"Washington D.C!" She thought, "White House".
She laughed at the thought, she laughed so hard ,her driver wondered what was wrong with her!

******************************************************************

Acknowledgements:

Beloved Witch - Ipsita Roy Chakraverti
Wikipedia
Google Image search for all the images.


This video inspired me to write this story: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtLNBLc7yaY&feature=related

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Random Letter to someone Part 6 ( Falling in and out of love)

Dear Someone,

I still remember the 1st time he SMS'd and the 1st time he called, I was least interested in his SMS's and the calls....I hardly spoke, many times did not bother replying to messages....but he pursued till he got my full attention, he pursued till I was convinced that he was genuine, and just when I relaxed.....he dropped the chase!

Now when I call or SMS, I get the same treatment I gave him once. Just the reasons are different. The reason I once ignored him is because I did not want to be his toy, whom he uses to his heart's desire and throws away. The reason he drops the chase is because he doesn't find things working out for us any more.

This and so many heartless, senseless reasons boys give girls every single day and break their hearts! I know of girls who play with boys hearts too, I wouldn't say I disapprove, but oh I hate it when it happens to me. I hate it when someone plays with my heart, I hate it when he makes it sound like its no big deal!

Damn! It is a big deal!

Why can't people be consistent in their words for once? Why do people promise when they don't have the courage to make things happen? Why do people take the liberty to change someone's life and then leave without saying a goodbye? Why do people make others dependent on themselves, only to snatch back that soothing hand some day?

I have seen a few couples who have made things work out for them in spite of all the odds. I've seen them cry away nights, it was easier for them at that point to drop the relationship and start out again, but they hung on, they made it work!

Every relationship has its trials and its errors. Nothing's ever perfect! Who wants perfection? Perfection is boring...a little bit of spice is always required to make life interesting! But so many people run away from the slightest trouble and pain, the slightest challenge and they shudder and they declare their defeat!

It's okay if you are wrong, as long as you do it with conviction and courage! How is it possible to take the right step always? But running away?? Why do people run away from a situation? Why do they back off?

There are a few tricks in politics, maybe this is one of those. When you are against a situation you aren't very sure of, you rather fight a little and then disappear into the darkness than keep on fighting till the end, till your complete defeat. Its called the Guerrilla warfare.

While the picture is all rosy and nice in the beginning, towards the end of it, all that remains is pure warfare. And then on, its all fair......running away, hiding, pursuit , public displays....whatever you choose....Its fair!~

Love

J

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

The Village Witch ( Part 8)

It had been 2 days since Anjali was missing. The police hadn’t come up with any information. Shankar decided he had to take matters in his own hands before he lost his daughter forever. He realized that the only people who could guide and help him would be the sadhus, the tantriks and the aghoris of the village, who usually meditated in unknown and quiet places, away from the city.


With the help of some old and knowledgeable village folks , Shankar was able to get together a team of individuals who would help him in his quest. A sadhu who owned an ashram on a hill, a tantrik famous in the nearby village for his 6th sense and an aghori meditating in the village crematorium grounds, some village folks who wandered in the country side and knew the hills and the plains well, the inspector and his assistant. Upon discussing the issue and checking out the map of the area, leaving out the places which were already searched by the police, Shankar zeroed down his search to 3 places, all in 3 opposite corners of the village, some far, some close by.

1 was a thick forest, a national park , the core area of which was hardly ever touched.

The second area was the mountain behind the Ashram of the Sadhu. The sadhu said that area was perfect for hiding, meditation and other private activities. Smuggling and poaching went on freely in those areas.

The 3rd was an underwater cave formed near the river. The cave was accessible only during low tides, at other times the river water blocked the entrance. The possibilities of anybody staying or hiding there for more than a day were negligible. But nobody could say for sure how deep the cave was, and whether there was an opening from the other side.



The Sadhu and some of his students volunteered to head into the mountains. Since they were closer to the area and had a better idea.

The inspector headed to the national park.

Shankar with his brothers and the Aghori headed to the cave.

Time was of utmost importance; whatever they thought, decided and acted upon had to be done at lightning speed.



Anjali felt her heart being pressed by some force.....her entire body was being controlled by some powerful energy...so much so that she couldn’t even breath on her own, her breath was controlled by someone else.

She couldn’t open her eyes, couldn’t move her legs and hands, she couldn’t speak but her mind was alert.

Suddenly she felt the force over her eyes loosen a bit and so she opened her eyes.

The 1st thing she saw were Meghna’s bright brown eyes that looked at her with a piercing gaze.

After having committed the mistake of approaching Meghna at night alone , this was her 2nd biggest mistake...to look into a witch’s eyes!

This was what Meghna was working at all the time. Everything was absolutely working as per the plan. If Anjali had looked anywhere else, getting her focus would have been difficult. Meghna would have to repeat the whole process of putting her under a spell and keeping her stable in that condition.

Anjali realized that Meghna was naked, she sat straight in front of her while Anjali, also naked was lying on some sort of a platform. Meghna breathed heavily, forcefully and Anjali realized that she too was breathing at the same rhythm...her breath was no more hers....it was Meghna’s.



Outside the cave, Shankar and the team prepared to dive into the water to enter the cave.



In her breathing and her meditations, Meghna realized that she had very little time to attain what she wanted...she had senses as sharp as a snake that picked up on heat and ground vibrations. Her sight was as piercing as that of an eagle, and her movements were as swift and graceful like a wild cat.



Anjali had only three strengths with which she could save herself-

1. Her eyesight,

2. 2nd: Her thought process or her brain and

3. her ears, she could hear everything that went on.



Her eyes were halfway under Meghna’s spell , and they were giving her away very quickly.....The eyes are the doors to one’s soul and that’s what Meghna was pushing in for....her soul! Anjali thought, with all her heart, with all the kindness that she had, she tried to plead with Meghna to spare her life. Meghna retorted back, “Be thankful that I’m not wishing you the same fate as mine....”

Anjali tried hard to free herself in every way.... but it was too difficult....Meghna’s breath and eyes had locked her down completely. After Anjali’s eyes were stable, Meghna got up from her seat and came close to Anjali. She calmly closed Anjali’s eyelids, as another of her senses closed down ,.....Anjali’s soul screamed for help, Anjali screamed for mercy.....At this point Anjali’s mind raced through every bit of her memory, every bit of emotion.

She remembered her father sitting with the wise man and the wise man had said Anjali will always be attracted towards the dark arts, she has the making of a powerful witch, but there is someone more sharper than her lurking besides her who is capable of taking away Anjali’s future, for better or worse!

She remembered some of Meghna’s last mails, she had cried for help, she pleaded Anjali to somehow come back and take her out of this hell, that her life and dreams were falling apart, that she is losing herself too soon...and her only hope was Anjali........ “This is the reason I am being punished? But I was only a child, I’m able to deal with it now, and I came back for you....I’m sorry I was late....please Meghna, I am innocent, I always wanted to help you.”



Meghna took a deep breath and touched Anjali’s feet.....Anjali felt a sensation , quite unknown to her......her legs were going numb and cold....as if dead! Then Meghna took another deep breath and moved both her hands upwards towards Anjali’s knees...everything Meghna touched was going numb and cold......Anjali realized this was the final assault...she was dying.....and she couldn’t do anything to stop the witch! Meghna took a third deeper breath and moved her hands over Anjali’s legs till they were dead!

Tears rolled down Anjali’s face..... “stop it please...please ...noooo.....God....please...help me, please!”



Meghna threw back her head and took a deeper breath and moved her hands over Anjali’s pelvis.



With the help of diving equipment , Shankar, 1 diver and the aghori made their way into the dark, untouched cave! After around 15 minutes of swimming, they reached a large rock that looked like the end of the cave. The diver went around the area to see if there was any opening anywhere, but there was none.



Meghna was breathing so heavy, Anjali could hear her breath, as Meghna started her journey towards Anjali’s heart and lungs....Anjali realized that her time was almost up and there was no point in praying. She thought about all the beautiful times she had with her parents and at college, but more than anybody else she thought about her father the most and realized that all this time, he had tried to protect her and save her from this day...and now all his efforts were in vein! She felt sorry for her parents....



Shankar saw a small iron rod fallen at the floor of the cave. He pointed it out to the diver. When the diver tried to pick it up, he realized that it was stuck and heavy. It wasn’t just any rod....



Meghna realized she was almost done when she felt Anjali’s last breath settling down. Meghna felt like a python, gulping its prey slowly and choking down the victim till the last breath...Her hands moved upwards towards Anjali’s neck and her face to complete the act!

Anjali..though had breathed her last, was still alive. She heard foot steps, she heard her father’s voice calling out to her...That was the last she heard, a few moments later she felt silence! Pure silence!



When Shankar ran into the cave, he saw Meghna lying on a platform and another woman bent on her, holding Meghna’s forehead.

When he approached the other woman, she looked up “Papa...” she said faintly and collapsed in his arms. Shankar covered his daughter with a shawl which was lying around....he was so happy and glad that he had found his daughter!

The Village Witch The Concluding part
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