For the woman in me!

I wish at times that I wasn't so interested in various things of life...that all I wanted to do was what others did,
I wished I did not think so much,
I wished I wasn't stressing myself out and expecting too much out of myself!
I wished I wasn't as inquisitive,

I wished I wasn't as daring to take on a challenge,

I wished there was only 1 thing I wanted to do, and 1 thing that I would excel in,
I wished I wasn't logical, so that I wouldn't question every tradition!
I wished I wasn't radical, so I wouldn't hurt everyone!
I wished I could love without expecting anything at all in return,
I wished I could be the woman with all of goodness,who bears all pain but never complaints!
-
-
-

If I was all I wished I wasn't, I wouldn't be me!

If I was interested in pleasing people, I would rather choose death to a life of slavery!

If doing as much as the ability and capacity as god has bestowed me with, means 'breaking tradition'....than be it!


I will question!
I will argue!

I will hit back if someone hurts me,
I will fight every obstacle standing before me,

The first few are empty words, I never would wish I was!
The truth is....
It's the biggest curse to be not interested in the various things life offers!
It's a shame, if I don't think and don't question!
I would consider myself a coward, if I wasn't daring!
If there was only 1 thing I was good at, I would be boring!
If I wasn't logical, that would mean I'm foolish!
If I would love without expecting anything , that would mean I've very low expectations out of myself!
And finally, I would never ever wish to be a woman with all the "Goodness"....
The so called "Goodness" only to serve others, and not one's self-interests,
The so called "Goodness" which makes me feeble and weak,

The so called "Goodness" that causes me pain and suffering!

To hell with the worldly notion of Goodness!

I will make my own rules!
And I will break them if they are of no use.
-
-
-

This post goes out to all the lovely women in my life, and to myself!
It isn't a cake walk to grow up to be a woman!
The society watches every step and attacks at our slightest mistake!
People comment on our body and laugh at our sizes,
People have notions about our beauty and anything that doesn't fit their definitions is tagged as ugly!
People make a whole lot of bullshit rules for us to follow,
People want to own us, want to tame us!
Because when a woman is free spirited, she has the greatest strength in the world,
And she can achieve anything!

The Day My God Died...

 "Who do you want to be when you grow up?"

Asked my teacher, Miss Anita in the class that day.
Everybody raised their hands.

Deepika said she wants to be a teacher.
Roshni wants to be a tailor.
Josna wants to be a housewife like her mother.

And then it was my turn.
" I want to fly a plane!"
Anita teacher looked at me for a long time.
"Who told you you can fly a plane?"

I did not know someone had to tell me who I should be...so I looked at the other girls starring at me now and some of them were giggling under their breaths.

"I see a plane flying every day. Mum tells me someone makes it fly and they are sitting in there.....I want to fly it some day!"

Anita teacher now smiled. " You will.....but you have to work very hard for it...study a lot........only then you can fly it!"

I nodded in excitement! All I heard her say was..." You will!"

I dreamt about it the whole time in school and I was still dreaming when I was on that bus to take me home. There was a landslide and the road was blocked. Our bus was stranded. Since the entire area is hilly, these things are quite common. I was very thirsty then and saw two ladies with a bottle of water. They saw me looking at them and offered me the water.

I drank it.
..............
..............
..............


Dreams.......they are made up of so much  unreality, made up of so many lies....
Dreams they say do come true if you really try hard.....
Dreams....I was riding on...
The highest dreams I had amongst them all.....
Then why.....??
Why me lord??
...............
...............
...............


I woke up in a dark room that had one window, but that too was closed.
The room was dirty and unkept and gave a foul smell.
For a while I felt disoriented...I could not distinguish between my reality or whether I was still dreaming.....Is it this dark inside the plane? I wondered!

I crawled to the door and knocked on it.
After 5 minutes a dark woman opened the door. I had never seen her before.
She helped me stand, and she inspected me.

"How old are you?"
"10"
"Okay."

She held my hand and brought me outside the room. It was almost a drag. But I was confused, why was this woman being so harsh on me?

She opened another door. There was a bed in that room.
"Are you hungry?" She asked.
"Yes."
"Then do what he asks you to do. Only then you will get food. Understand?"

......................
......................
......................

That was just the first amongst many of the warnings I got  there......and within a day the warnings were followed by beatings and kicking, and if that was not enough burning cigarettes were put on my skin to burn me slowly!


I wouldn't do what the uncle's asked me to do....
I wouldn't do what the old aunties asked me to do...
I wouldn't budge.....
I did not know what part of the world I was in,
I did not understand the language they spoke in.

My "No" had no meaning to them,
My "Dreams" were starting to lose their meaning to me,
The stripping, the rapes, My screams, My pain,
All lost its meaning day by day,

If there is god, as my mum said, I want to ask him," What was my fault?"
If there is god, I want to know, why he can't hear my prayers and my calls?
I want to know why my feathers were chopped off so harshly even before I could fly?
I want to know why should I only have to cry?

*************************************************************************

"The Day My God Died!" is a documentary I found on youtube while reading about girl trafficking. The stories of the young girls, in this case Nepalese girls trafficked to Mumbai are horrifying , terrifying!

I know that most of us watch or read about such stories by completely disconnecting "Our" lives from "theirs"!

Because we've had secure childhood,
Because we have our parents always protecting us,
Because we have the money and the education,
Because we belong to a particular family,caste .......

We think we are superior, untouched by the filth that surrounds us.

"Oh those Prostitutes.....they are the black sheep of the female species!",
" Those women are so cheap!"....

Most of us have seen at least 1 standing at a road side, or walking on a road at midnight in some part of the city,sometime.

"They do it because they enjoy it!" .....

Is it really?

Please watch the video and decide for yourself where our human civilization is heading and what are we doing about it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BV5W6F4L5i8&feature=relatedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BV5W6F4L5i8&feature=related

50 Questions that will free your mind!

A good mail from a friend, worth sharing with everyone.

Please take your time on every question and do share your opinions on any or every questions, if you feel so!
 

These questions have no right or wrong answers.......

Because sometimes asking the right questions is the answer..........

1.     How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

2.     Which is worse, failing or never trying?

3.     If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?

4.     When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

5.     What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?

6.     If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?

7.     Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

8.     If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?

9.     To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?

10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?

11. You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire.  They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend.  The criticism is distasteful and unjustified.  What do you do?

12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?

13. Would you break the law to save a loved one?

14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?

15. What’s something you know you do differently than most people?

16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy?

17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do?  What’s holding you back?

18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?

19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?

20. Do you push the elevator button more than once?  Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?

21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?

22. Why are you, you?

23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?

24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?

25. What are you most grateful for?

26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?

27. Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?

28. Has your greatest fear ever come true?

29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset?  Does it really matter now?

30. What is your happiest childhood memory?  What makes it so special?

31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?

32. If not now, then when?

33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?

34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?

35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?

36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?

37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?

38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?

39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before?

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?

43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living?

44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?

45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?

46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?

48. What do you love?  Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?

49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday?  What about the day before that?  Or the day before that?

50. Decisions are being made right now.  The question is:  Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?

Hush Hush Darling!

They  sat outside the ICU the whole evening, there was nothing else to do but wait!

Shreya cried continuously, " I just don't understand what gets into her? Did we do something wrong while bringing her up?"

He had no answers to her questions or to the questions of his own mind...... " You know what is happening , don't you? Don't pretend! The more you pretend, the more they will suffer!"

He pushed aside his thoughts and tried to think straight, but he couldn't......his mind was continuously forcing him to go back in time and remember.....continuously forcing him to dig into his memories and answer.

" Darling, you love me don't you?"

He heard a whisper in his ears and he shuddered, he looked around and brushed his right shoulder as if someone had touched him ...Shreya watched Sandeep suddenly looking around " What happened?"

"Nothing!"

" Then why are you looking around?"

" It's nothing......"

........

.......

.......

Engineering College - Year 1978

Rohit, munching on a Samosa, " Did you check out that new girl in Electronics? Hot Property Boss!"

Sandeep took a puff from his cigarette and watched her walk by.

Suresh smiled looking at Sandeep, " So are you going to do something about her or not?"

Sandeep watched for a long time without saying a word. When he had finished his cigarette and his thinking he got up and went after the girl.

The other two laughed!

......

......

......

Shreya watched Niki with tearful eyes as she lay lifeless in her hospital bed. Niki had been such a bubbly and an enthusiastic girl, always topping her class, intelligent and frank. They always shared a beautiful mother daughter relationship until a few years back. Suddenly her personality had started changing. Her beautiful baby doll had turned into a sick old tired angry desperate girl! Shreya blamed herself for Niki's condition...."How didn't I see she needed me? Where was I ? How did she slip out of my hands, so fast, so suddenly that I could not even catch her till she was completely lost?"

.........

........

........

Kavita was not exactly a girl you would call sober! She was a complete Maverick. She smoked, she abused and she did drugs! But she was also the topper in her class, did her engineering and helped her dad in his Real estate business...she knew more about cars and buildings than the Mechanical and Civil engineering students  and she knew more about Indian Culture , philosophy and spirituality than anybody else on the campus. In short, she was a genius! A kind never seen in this college and in this society before! But with great brains came great Ego, the kind  no man could tolerate. And so every boy and every man on the campus spoke of her to be a "Bitch" and a "Slut" , and women on the campus, out of sheer wonder for this woman but having no guts to speak for her ,followed suit with the man and labeled her as The bad girl of the Engineering College!

.............

...........

...........

It was Niki's 20th Birthday. Her family and close friends were all gathered around the table. She cut the cake and took out a slice and fed it to her papa and the little cream that was left on his lips, she licked it, " You like that don't you darling?"

Shreya and the rest of the family and friends watched in shock!

Sandeep looked into those eyes, full of passion, full of longing.....he pushed her away immediately, " This can't be my daughter! She can't!"

 One moment after that, Niki collapsed.

..........

...........

..........

Sandeep had many girl friends but he had never been in love.

Kavita was like a breath of fresh air. She was smart, intelligent and a whole person.

Sandeep had known Kavita for over 8 months now. And contrary to many people's opinion, Sandeep knew that Kavita was not the whore the whole world thought she was. In fact Kavita had a pure soul , she was much better than the other girls who showed themselves to be very chaste and simple and pure.

" You don't fit in this society Kavita. You have no idea what they think about you and talk of you.... they won't let you live here."

" I've survived so far, haven't I?"

" that's because you are still in college. as you grow older things are going to get tougher for you.........this attitude is not acceptable by them.... they...."

" Hush Sandeep...Shoooo"... She lifted him palm and kissed him..." I'll be fine!"

" I don't trust them with you Kavita......I want to be there for you forever. Promise me you will never leave me Kavita. I will protect you, I will guard you...When I am around they will never be able to do anything to you...."

Kavita's eyes filled with tears , " Sandeep...nobody has ever said anything that beautiful to me so far."

He held her close and kissed her on her forehead.

Only they both knew what they felt for each other.

For the rest of the wold, it was a dirty joke.

.........

.........

........

The doctor came out after the examination.

" I need to speak to both of you about Niki and something about her behavior. The way she has attacked herself in a very cold and ruthless manner goes to show that she was mentally disturbed! The wounds are deep. How has she been in the past couple of years? did you see some signs, some changes? Anything at all? anything other than her birthday incident?"

" Yes....for the past couple of months she has been getting a bit...what to say....bold in her ways with Sandeep...., isn't it Sandeep? I think she is behaving weird around men, not just Sandeep as such..."

Doctor cut her short, " What do you mean by bold with Sandeep?"

" Do you remember what she did on the dining table that day Sandeep? We were having dinner together as always and I was asking her something....I don't remember what now, and Niki was constantly looking at Sandeep, in a weird way, very bold, seductive like, you know?"

" Hmm... I see.....so didn't you talk to her about it?"

" Doctor, we thought this is all a part of growing up....I thought she's growing up a bit too soon into a woman! And you know with the kind of exposure you see on Television, youngsters are getting disoriented with their sexuality! I really lost my mind that day.... I slapped her......I did not know what else to do with her!"

" You slapped her?"

..............

..............

.................

They were running through the hospital corridor. Kavita lay on the stretcher, her neck bleeding, clothes tattered........Sandeep held her hand. 

His worst fears had come true!

Kavita had been victimised by this society.

She was raped by  6 boys for 2 days. Her throat was slit and her body thrown on a distant hill. A group of trekkers had discovered her body a few hours after she was thrown there. 

Surprisingly, she was breathing and conscious.

Now lying in that stretcher, she looked constantly at Sandeep.......and he felt defeated, he felt helpless, he had failed...he had not been able to protect her.....he was responsible for her condition!

Just when they reached the operation theater, Kavita breathed her last.......She died looking at him, she died in his hands!

................

...............

...............

" I feel so guilty for slapping her!" 

" Sandeep, I need to ask you , any other incidents you can think of which Shreya might have not noticed?"

Sandeep was lost in his reverie.

" Mr Sandeep...... are you listening?"

...........

.............

.............

The doctor approached Shreya.

" Shreya, I think we need to talk."

They were both seated in his consulting.

The doctor was taking more than necessary efforts to make Shreya comfortable. He asked her if she wanted water, if the A/C temperature had to be adjusted. She knew what she was about to hear was not pleasant. She stopped him,

" Doctor, please tell me what it is......and please tell me directly! Don't beat around the bush."

He sighed.

" Yes! I've to tell you clearly, that is the only way........... you do know that this is not just about Niki."

Shreya was a bit confused.

"What do you mean?"

" Shreya........Sandeep is mentally ill....he is delusional!"

Shreya felt a sudden jolt.

"Your husband is the reason your daughter has Dissociative Identity Disorder or in other words Split personality.

Niki has been continuously abused by Sandeep from her childhood, that is the reason she took  a new identity, that of a woman. Bold, Seductive and Confidant!

Now you can not say that Sandeep wanted to hurt her intentionally, in fact he loves her a lot. But in her he sees his past girl friend "Kavita". So to him, he's only loving Kavita.

And Niki plays Kavita, or whatever that she thinks Kavita is , from his abstract descriptions of her!

Sandeep has never been able to get over Kavita's death.You know she was raped and murdered.......You do know about Kavita right?"

Shreya was numb.

" Shreya, you need to talk about this......for better understanding."

" I don't understand Doctor."

" What?"

" I was Sandeep's girlfriend from engineering days, I have been his first girl friend. Kavita was my name before marriage. But he hated it so I changed it to Shreya .......... I remember There was an incident of a rape and murder in our college days that had become a big scandal ........"

"Did Sandeep know the girl?"

" No. I don't think so. Sandeep has always been a very shy guy. He doesn't talk much, as you must have noticed. He never spoke to any other girl besides me......."

" I see....do you know anything else about that incident?"

" Nothing much....except the girl's name .............. Nikita!"

(Image at http: https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNIyxsqX3CGNC3gTOoIgaJUES6gHAnntkBKBL56nE0xuyTcNkk97h9fIRmGqmMyug5Hb2pzInwPKeYe7TS4Sh72NamKUr0t-TTunPQntfyhBjbNkSprjq6EqN3FoOggyE1lNUpFQpSpMs/s1600-h/keep_quiet_by_firemisha.jpg)

U N I ( Part 10)

FREEZE.....

That was Krupal's wishful order for everyone!

Juhi stood there facing Nidhi...a red rose in her hands and an envelope...She did not recognize Nidhi, she had never met her before.
Nidhi looked at Juhi and immediately recognized her......
Both the ladies turned expectantly to Krupal!

Krupal's wishful order seemed to have worked only on him.....he did not move, nor did his facial expression change, only his eyes moved from Juhi to Nidhi and back to Juhi and lastly to the Private Detective who stood in one corner enjoying the scene!
The detective realized this was an explosive situation, he would have loved to wait and watch but Krupal's look was too scary to take a chance so he ran downstairs.

The expectant expression on Juhi's face turned to realization. Who else can this girl be?
Nidhi turned to look at Juhi again, and with tears in her eyes, she stepped closer to Juhi and caught her hands.
"I've nothing against you Juhi.....But I love this man too much.....And he just lies to me and abandons me in the middle of nowhere...what am I to do? What would you have done?"

Krupal was shocked to see a sudden change in Nidhi's tone," Liar Liar" He muttered to himself!
"Pardon me?" Nidhi asked.
"She's a lawyer!" Krupal told Juhi in a "Introductory" Style.
Juhi looked in Krupal's eyes, longer than necessary.
She took a moment to think...Nidhi was still holding her hands.

"Krupal doesn't love you Nidhi. That is the truth!"
"We are getting Engaged on Monday Juhi....I just gave him his Engagement clothes and he took them. That is also the truth!"

"You can't force yourself on him......you might make things work temporarily, but in the long run, its going to break!"
"You can't assume to know him.......1 week isn't enough to know a man!"

What the hell was happening?
Here are two ladies, in love with the same man, arguing over who gets him?
For a moment Krupal felt proud......usually you get to hear stories of men fighting over a woman...but here, he had turned the tables!
But then, where was this leading? Both the ladies have strong personalities, and this can take an ugly turn!
What was Krupal to do?
Stop it? Let it carry on?
He chose to let it carry on.
It was like a tennis match......right now the ball was in Juhi's court!

"I am not assuming anything Nidhi! It's not a toy we are fighting on. He's a free person and he has to make this choice, we arguing here and playing with words means nothing at the end of it!"
"You talk like a sensible woman....but you definitely don't behave like one!"
"Excuse me?"
"Don't you have a conscience? Don't you care about your character and reputation that you just move in with any man who asks you to? Or was it your idea?"

Juhi did not answer, she just smiled,"Nidhi You can't chain and cage someone you love, you have to let them be free!"
"You please don't tell me about letting him be free! I let him be free enough to go and kiss you in that restaurant on our date, I let him be free enough to live with you and sleep with you just a week before our Engagement!"

Juhi looked at Krupal,"Is she even understanding what I'm talking about Krupal?"

"Monday 4 pm Krupal......you promised! I gave you your time, your space, your freedom! What more do you want? Tell me where I went wrong? Why are you doing this to me? We've known each other for so long Krupal! I cannot imagine a life without you......Please don't leave me...please don't let me down! I've woven too many dreams for both of us.....I've thought for too long about our house, about our family, our children....I'll be lost without you in my life Krupal! Please try to understand......tomorrow.....please come!"

Nidhi was about to leave, when Juhi stopped her.
"Why can't you two sit inside and talk and decide for today whatever it is. Why wait till tomorrow?"
"You don't interfere in between both of us please. So Krupal...4pm, you promised! I'll be waiting!"

"Nidhi, please come inside!" Krupal was finally speaking.
And Nidhi suddenly felt she was losing the battle.
"I don't want to talk with you in front of her!"
"Okay. We can sit inside the room!"
"No...Not there too."
Nidhi had started behaving like an adamant child fighting for a toy.

"Okay, you two can sit in the hall and I'll go out...fine with you?" Juhi offered.
"I want some water!" Nidhi had started crying...with every passing moment, passing sentence, she was getting the vibes of a loss. And she hated losing. University Topper she was...she had never failed in life.....She had always calculated in advance and everything had worked out her way!
Juhi got her water,"Can I get you some tea ,coffee or lime water perhaps?"
"Lime water".
"Okay!"

Krupal was a silent spectator in this world of female communication!He could not understand what exactly was happening at the moment? Were they fighting? Were they being friends? Colleagues? Who's helping whom? Is this really helping or is it making things worse? Should he be talking or letting the females handle it their way?

Again, he chose the later! He let them handle it their way!

Nidhi and Krupal sat on the sofa. Juhi went in the kitchen to make Lime water.
"I'm sorry Nidhi. But I don't think it will work."
"It's okay.....You've been giving me the signals for quite some time...but it is too difficult for me to let go of something I like so much!"
"I'm not some-thing Nidhi! I'm not your toy! I should have stopped you long back when you started dominating me....but I thought that stage would pass by! But it didn't, and our relationship did more harm than good!"
Nidhi: "Love always hurts Krupal, doesn't mean a relationship is failing!"
Krupal: " Love doesn't hurt Nidhi....Love heals!"


Nidhi sighed,"Hmm....That's well said! Krupal,You are in love with her...why couldn't you tell me when I told you about the Engagement?"
He laughed,"Do you know that you are a terror at times?"

She thought for a while,"How am I to manage without you?"
"Oh come on! You've always been on your own Nidhi...its just in our mind that someone else is there, has to be there.....but in reality, you've never been dependent on me as such..you are quite independent!"

"Are you dependent on her?" Nidhi asked.
Krupal put a hand on Nidhi's shoulder,"From the day I met her!"
"What about her?"
"She's useless without me!"
They both laughed a little.
And fell silent for a while.
"So....are we going to remain friends?"
"We could...do you want to?"
"I kind of liked her.....she's mature and composed! If she was some Bimbo I would have lost all respect for you!"
"Hehe! So you want to be friendly with me because you like her?"
"No....Nothing like that!"

They looked at each other," Krupal....I'm going to miss you!"
"What about me are you going to miss the most?", Krupal asked.
"Who am I going to boss over now?"
"Ohh! That part you are going to miss, is it?"
"What will you miss about me?" Nidhi asked innocently.
"Who will boss over me now? Nobody ever bossed on me the way you did- not my parents, not teachers..nobody!"
"Don't worry....I still retain the right to boss over you!"

"People...can I come in and disturb you please?" Juhi came with the tray of drinks and snacks.

Nidhi took a bite of a biscuit and asked Juhi,"How do you know it is love, when it happens?"
"I did not know.....I realized ..with time....Time brings all the answers!"
"How do you know whether this will last?"
"There's no way to tell actually...but it just feels right! I've no doubts.....and I'm sure he doesn't have too! It's not a chance that we are taking with each other.....we know we are in love!"
"And if it fails?"
"True love doesn't fail! It cannot fail!"
"Oh God! I'm going to cry!" Nidhi cupped her face with her palms and started crying. The tears were for the first failure of her life! The tears were for the realizations that this failure had brought to her, the lessons that she learnt from this experience!

Juhi put a hand around Nidhi's neck and tried to soothe her, and Nidhi turned to Juhi and hugged her!
"Oh my god...this is going to make me cry now....! Women....These things you do...my god!" Krupal joined them and hugged them both! He kissed both the ladies on their forehead," Oh god! I must have been God's favourite to deserve women like you two in my life...and there's another one.."
"Who?" Both Nidhi and Juhi shot up their heads to look at Krupal.
"Mom!" He said with wide eyes!
All three of them laughed, all three of them hugged and cried!

The next day, there was no Engagement! It was called off!

Juhi and Krupal wanted to take more time so they continued living in together for the rest of the year and got married the following year.

Krupal's mother was shocked to hear the turn of events and in the change of plans.....but then," These things these young confused people do now a days.....Let them handle it their way!" She said and stepped aside.

Initially it was a bit tough for Nidhi to deal with the whole loss..but Juhi and Krupal stood by her so that she could deal with the emotional side effects of a break up!

"This doesn't feel like a break up at all...maybe that's why I'm more confused about how to deal with it!" Nidhi often complained.

"Go start dating, meet new people, you'll be fine!" Juhi advised her.

"Do you know of any young eligible bachelors?"

"Actually .....I do!" 

Juhi introduced Nidhi to Swamy. 

It did not work...it was a disaster!

After that Swamy officially pledged not to date anybody recommended by J -1st Smitha, then Nidhi.....He would rather find someone by himself!

Nidhi is currently single, and ready to mingle.

If any of you young boys want a smart intelligent independent and nice girl, you could think about her.

And she's grown up now, she's no more controlling as she was once upon a time.

***************************** *******THE END*************************************

Your Feedback, suggestions and comments are most welcome!

Song in Part 8 : You and I performed by Scorpions.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgUKG6w9CBM

Image at : https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdO0MzbjKLo8wF9A8We2ZQ4-h4HEj0D7BLllqZ2z6pLabJeor8Zi05YrWD-wds6VVsbtCEinKxaoBsqzlLn-lCxBaRhGsNE02X2XZzWGb529eESCMTJT4mHQIDpGyIIXz2sc1oAt-1gsEM/

U N I ( Part 9)

"Are you alright Madam?"
Nidhi was still looking at the photos she received.
She took a long moment to compose herself, to think straight and not to take a hasty decision...when she was ready, there was only one thing she wanted to know," Where are they staying?"

-------------------------------------

Location: CCD

He was looking at her....she was looking down at her hands the whole time.
He waited for her to look up, he waited for her to show up...to show herself...the way he knew her!
That was his 'J'!
As he had never seen her before......quiet and dull!

"So this is the reason you've been Working From Home all 5 days!"
Just a Nod from Juhi.

"If you have to go for a date, you ask me to accompany you...and you take such a huge decision...and you keep me uninformed??. ....J.....I need to know, what made a mature reasonable and responsible lady like you to take a decision like this? What was the need to move in with a man who already has an engagement planned in a week's time? Why did you enter a losing situation J? You of all the people ? I look up to you......You ,you were my hero J!"

Juhi had never seen Swamy get so upset. The stress on "You WERE my hero!" was unmistakable!

"I did not know Krupal was such a Bastard!" Swamy could only think of blaming Krupal for J's condition.
"Please........don't!" She spoke for the 1st time this evening. The rest of the information she had told him through an e mail in the morning.
"Do  you at least know that he is getting engaged on Monday and that is 2 days from now?"
" Yes......."
"Do you love him?"
"I don't know....."
"Does he love you?"
"He says he does...."
"What do you want to do now?"
"I don't know...."

Swamy was shocked and irritated with her indecisiveness...a quality he had never seen in Juhi before.
"Well.....Why did you call me here?"
"I want your help....."
"How?"
"In making a decision........that is right for me!" She looked up at him for the first time, eyes  full of tears and confusion," I can't make up my mind Swamy."

Swamy had seen 'J' take some of the most difficult business decisions- she was always composed and calm in the face of difficulty! She was always in control of herself and the situation. Even if everything was wrong, a single look at her, had given Swamy a sense of relief....."J Baby will take care of it all!" He would tell himself!

And here was his J.....not being able to understand her feelings for a man, not being able to understand what was happening to her.........This Business lady was being beaten and defeated........by nothing but just one emotion....."Love".

He looked at her a long time- when he 1st read the e mail he had been angry, when he saw her sitting like that with her head hung low, he was disappointed! When he heard her talk like an immature school girl, he felt cheated! And now looking in those eyes...all red and full of tears, he realized the simple beauty of life and the magic of falling in love as he had never seen before!

He got up from his seat and sat next to her. He put his hand on her shoulder...she was still crying!
He looked at her with a simple smile.
"What?" She asked, irritated! " What's so funny about this?"
" Madam........you are in love with Krupal!"
She looked away and shook her head in disbelief!
"No matter how much you hate this fact, no matter how much you wanted to avoid this fall........you have fallen in love with that man...as innocently as a child...just the way it should be! Love , they say, you don't understand when you fall in it....it cannot be planned.....it just happens....and all you can do is feel the magic and go with the flow...and thank god, for making you one of those few lucky people, who truly and deeply touch this emotion in all its purity!"

"Which is the latest Hindi film you watched? Dialogues are good!"

Swamy laughed out loud!
"I'm only surprised with your conviction that you have built all these years that there is nothing called love....and when life is telling you in the loudest of its ways that 'Lady, see I proved you wrong...you are in love!' you rather get confused and cry than accept your defeat and enjoy the feeling!"

"You are not helping me in any way Swamy!"

"You are not ready to accept the truth J! This is not something to cry about...its something to celebrate! J baby is finally in love.......gosh! Hats off to Dr.Krupal! Something he must have done....what is it Madam? You and him alone in that flat.....something must have happened..."

"Nothing happened Swamy!"
"Hmm....I believe you!"
"Are you taunting me?"
"Staying together, liking each other, being attracted to each other and yet nothing happens.....ideal situation for love to creep in! So now you know....it's not lust....now you know that its not just a physical need."

" Yes! Both of us could just talk and listen to songs and sing and dance and cook and get a bit romantic, yet give each other the space, respect and try to understand what is the connection between us really...." Juhi was lost in her thoughts...." 5 days Swamy! I was all alone with him for 5 days.......I had the most beautiful time of my life!Oh my god.....is this love?"

"Yes J it is! Now cheer up! Go tell him...and enjoy this feeling girl!"
"What are people in love supposed to do Swamy? Should I buy him flowers and cards and gifts and a cake or..."
" That's what films and business people tell you ,to sell their stuff.....think J..what do you really want to do? How do you want to express yourself?"
"You are right Swamy! I don't want to buy something that everybody can buy with money......I want to do something special for him...very special!"

-------------------------------------------------------------

Krupal was simply surfing through the channels when the door bell rang.
He checked the time, Juhi had told him she's on her way, so it must have been her!
He went in the kitchen and brought the cake that he had baked for her and then with a bang, he opened the door, " Dhen te ne!"

" Wow! Beautiful New Zealand , isn't it?" It was Nidhi, followed by her private detective.
"Nidhi...wha....what are you .....?"
"Doing here? Wherever you go, my network follows!" She pointed at the detective! She was smiling so much that Krupal felt intimidated. She just stood there in the door not saying a word.
Krupal wanted her to shout, to cry...say something at least....but the last thing he wanted her to do was to smile!

"Aren't you going to call me in?" She asked smiling.
" Of course...come in...not you!" He said to the private detective and closed the door on his face.
Nidhi handed over the packet she was carrying.
"What is it?"
"Your clothes for the Engagement!"
"Engagement?"
"You forgot?"
"But Niddhi....."
"I don't want to talk about it......I know what you are up to, you can run but you can't hide from me...understand?"
She turned to go and opened the door, Juhi had just reached the floor. Both the ladies faced each other.
Krupal's worst nightmare was about to begin!

( Last part........coming soon!)